Kids Will Benefit From Great Idea
Dear Ann Landers: My ex-husband and I have been divorced for several years. We have joint custody of our sons, ages 10 and 6. We have managed to put our bitterness behind us, and now, we have a friendly relationship geared toward being good parents. Our sons have adjusted well. My ex-husband has dated several women, and I have been seeing a gentleman for about six months.
Before the divorce, my ex and I spoke often of taking the boys on vacations to New York or Washington, D.C. The children are now at the age where we think they would get a lot out of such trips. However, neither my ex nor I feel comfortable attempting it alone. We are thinking of trying a “family” vacation, with both of us participating. We would have separate hotel rooms and share equally in the expenses and parenting duties. I believe the boys would benefit from seeing us together, behaving in a civilized manner.
When I mentioned our plans to friends and family members, some were appalled. They said we would be sending mixed messages to our children. My gentleman friend agrees with me that it would be a great way to take the kids on a vacation. My ex-husband’s current girlfriend, however, accused him of trying to get back together with me.
Ann, my ex and I get along a lot better now than when we were married. We have no intention of getting back together. We are trying to act in a responsible manner and provide opportunities for our kids that they may not get otherwise. What do you think? - Want to Do the Right Thing
Dear W.T.D.T.R.T.: I think it’s a great idea, and I say go for it. Divorce is hard on children. It’s good to let them see that you can treat one another in a civilized manner, even though you are no longer married. Drop me a postcard from Washington or New York, and let me know how it’s going.
Dear Ann Landers: I read with great interest your column about young children being in opposite-sex locker rooms or rest rooms. I am not a parent, but I believe children older than 2 years of age do not belong in an opposite-sex bathroom or locker room.
Recently, I was in a men’s bathroom at the library, facing the wall, when I heard giggling. I turned around, zipped up my trousers and saw two little girls, about 5 and 6 years of age. They were waiting for their father, who was using a stall with the door closed. I was uncomfortable and angry but said nothing because I didn’t want to upset the girls.
Another unpleasantness occurred at my health club recently. A man kept bringing his 4-year-old daughter into the locker and shower room. I told an attendant that I would notify the police if this continued. The man did not bring her in after that.
Please tell these ignorant fathers that if I were to expose myself to their kids, I would be arrested - and rightfully so. - Disgusted in Chicago
Dear Disgusted: You told them, and I am grateful. I would, however, put the cutoff at age 4 for children in opposite-sex locker rooms and toilet facilities.
Dear Ann Landers: A fellow who works in our office told me he just got back from a town in Ohio where he visited a small museum that had 2,700 kinds of hearing aids. Is this possible? - Miss E.X.
Dear Miss E.X.: What did you say? I can’t hear you.