Critters Gestapo Devises Half Of A Final Solution For Wolves

Thu., Aug. 13, 1998

D.F. Oliveria Opinion Writer

The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service can’t figure out why a pack of wolves in Montana’s Ninemile Valley now prefers veal cutlets to venison. Duh! Mr. Potatohead is no expert, but he did see “Jurassic Park.” Any kid could tell you that meat eaters have this thing for scrumptious herbivores, of any species. Now, the F&W brainiacs hope to break the pattern and reduce the pack’s need for meat by (drum roll, please) killing half of the six adult wolves. And these geniuses are in charge of wolf reintroduction?

Crime turns crusader into tax man

Sure, Kootenai County’s criminal justice system needs more cops and legal beagles. But there’s something ironic about Commissioner Ron Rankin defending a guesstimated $1 million tax increase in the county budget. The ol’ anti-tax crusader even is willing to give the hired hands more pay. Rankin, however, opposes any raises for other bosses and himself. So, hold the Hot Potato … Meanwhile, CdA Mayor Steve Judy and his City Hall playmates earn Sweet Potatoes for proposing to drop city taxes another buck. Incredibly, city taxes on a $100,000 home have fallen $10 since 1990. Do you suppose growth really is paying for itself?.

Tater Tots: Those hazy, lazy days of summer

After all the hubbub about neo-Nazis this summer, it’s refreshing to get back to a familiar controversy: field burning. Fall and prep football must be around the corner … News Item: Six firms want to redesign CdA’s public lake shore. Do you suppose that double I hit in my final at bat of the co-rec season Thursday will be the final time I run (my word, not yours) the bases at McEuen Field? Stay tuned … For those keeping score at home, Seattle has won both games pitcher Randy Johnson would have started if he hadn’t been traded to Houston. The Big Moper, of course, has won both of his games, too, pitching like the old Johnson who led Seattle to the playoffs in 1995 … While peeling apples on the back step with my preteen Saturday, I finally hit the saturation point with Clinton and the First Intern. Moments into a talk show host’s description of the alleged relationship between Mr. Bill and Monica, I switched radio channels. The last thing I wanted was my youngster asking me to define terms … Gee, it didn’t take long for the state Parks and Recreation Department to crawl into bed with the Hagadone Corp. Now, Director Yvonne Ferrell & Co. think excess state land along the Centennial Trail should be used by The Company for private parking instead of by the public for a lake view picnic area. Horsefeathers.

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