Cheap Seats
Introducing … Mr. Modesty
San Francisco Giants outfielder Barry Bonds has never been accused of mincing words, as illustrated by this diatribe against reporters who were critical of his performance earlier this season.
“I’ve never had an off year,” Bonds said. “I’ve never had a bad season since I was with the San Francisco Giants. I’ve been doing it for years, consistently, every year. There isn’t a person in this locker room who can carry my jock strap. And I’m not saying that to be derogatory.
Nope. Just arrogant.
Calling Ken Starr
Joining the movement to write off the local NFL team and avoid the rush, the Washington Post’s Tony Kornheiser has lost confidence in quarterbacks Gus Frerotte and Trent Green.
“At the present time, Gus has less support in Washington than Bill Clinton has,” writes Kornheiser. “When Ken Starr is done shredding Clinton, Redskins fans will want him to go after Gus… .
“Actually, the best quarterback available to the Redskins Monday night might (have been ABC telecaster) Boomer Esiason. It’s a win-win situation. Boomer has always wanted to play here, and … John Kent Cooke wouldn’t even have to pay Boomer’s travel expenses.”
Love thy enemy as thyself
The sight of Gary Gaetti and Sammy Sosa hugging McGwire after his historic home run proved to some old-timers just how much the game has changed.
New York Yankees manager Joe Torre wondered aloud how Cubs pitcher Steve Trachsel must have felt watching his teammates congratulate someone who had just homered off him.
“It made everybody happy, and that’s great,” Torre said. “Both (McGwire) and Sammy are class acts. But if I’m Trachsel, I’m having a hard time with everybody hugging him.”
Just show him the money
Actually, Trachsel doesn’t mind being linked with the infamous feat. In fact, he hopes to profit from it.
“I’ve been giving my agent a hard time,” he said, “because a couple of guys came in and said, ‘You should be getting about 10 grand a month for the rest of your life in autograph signings.’ And my agent hasn’t gotten any calls yet.”
Hail fellow, seldom met
Kansas City Chiefs general manager Carl Peterson tells of the day he extended his hand after a victory over the Raiders and Raiders owner Al Davis refused to shake it.
Said Davis, according to Peterson: “Not now, Carl, it’s not a good time.”
Care for a game of Powerball?
In the wake of the double-barreled assault on the records, the Chicago Tribune’s Skip Bayless no longer believes hitting a home run is the most difficult thing in sports.
“I don’t know if I’m watching baseball or if I’m trapped in a video game - Sony Slug Station,” writes Bayless.
The last word …
“I put the broad in broadcasting.”- Sherry Ross, the first woman to be an analyst on the broadcasts of an NHL team