‘Bi-State’ Area Doesn’T Quite Fly

Thu., Sept. 17, 1998

By Paul Turner srpaulturner@gmail.com

It’s just a theory.

But we suspect hardly anyone refers to the Spokane-Coeur d’Alene market as the “bi-state” area because it sounds too sexual.

* Eat, drink, see men in lederhosen: The 28th annual Deutschesfest (pronounced Doy-ches-fest) gets under way Friday in Odessa, Wash.

This sausage-saturated festival, one of the Inland Northwest’s best excuses to binge on sauerkraut, runs through Sunday. The phrase to remember: block-long biergarten.

Call (509) 982-0049 for details.

* Video generation: Two little boys in Fran Menzel’s pre-kindergarten class at Trinity Catholic School were excitedly perusing a “Where’s Waldo?” book when Menzel reminded one of them that he hadn’t cleared off his snack area.

As that boy got up, he turned to his friend. Pointing at the book, he said, “Pause that till I come back.”

* Right of way: Most mornings, Monica Somes gets out the stroller, gathers up her son and heads out the door about 7 a.m. Then she pushes 10-month-old Colton over a decent sized chunk of the South Hill.

Both enjoy these outings.

But Monica would like them even more if even occasionally motorists recognized that they aren’t supposed to zoom past someone in the middle of a clearly marked crosswalk.

“Nobody will stop for us,” she explained in a nonwhiny way.

* Overheard at the Satellite Diner: “Winter is on its way.”

Technically, that’s true. But remember. If the magic marmot, Riverfront Phil, sees his shadow next week on the last day of summer, it means we’ll have a long autumn.

* Slice answers: Linda Alexander would call an opera set in Spokane “Madame Moth.”

We heard from a huddle of readers who said Mt. Spokane High School has the area’s best-looking football uniforms. (They’re crimson, navy and white.)

Several callers trashed the powder blue worn by the defending state champions from Central Valley.

* “Fore”: Joel Bonvallet noticed that the outhouses on a golf course in St. Regis, Mont., came from a company called “MONTANA FLASHER.”

“Who’s watching?” he wondered.

* Despite what you’ve heard: Just sitting near pregnant women at work doesn’t mean YOU will get pregnant.

* Today’s Slice question: How many men are aware that when women talk among themselves, one “guys” topic that often comes up is a frank critique of various men’s facial hair?

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