Don’T Run Barefoot Through This Grass

Vegging out at Corbin Park the other day, we saw approximately 400 dogs do their business on the grass.

And here’s a shocker. Their owners were less than diligent about picking up after them.

So watch your step.

* Best Used Cars/Battleships: Back in 1966, Bob Ward bought a 1953 Cadillac for $40. “I drove it for more than a year,” he said.

That wouldn’t be a bad car to have today. You could cruise along singing (to the tune of the “Ghostbusters” theme), “I ain’t afraid of no SUVs.”

* Sports Memories That Haunt: Margaret Underwood recalled playing basketball in high school in Ephrata in 1935. She wore a white blouse and knee-length shorts. It was the first time she had to take a shower in front of the other girls.

“Naked! Bare! No clothes on!” she wrote. “There was a lone shower head on the restroom wall. We had to walk under the flow of water. I’ve seen tobacco chewers who could spit more liquid than that shower put out.

“There were a dozen or so of us and, having gotten more or less wet, we had to walk in a circle applying soap until we got back to the feeble flow to rinse off.

“Having been brought up to be super-modest, the whole business was horrifying, especially to a 99-pound, 5-foot-tall, flatter-than-a-flitter girl.

“Sixty-four years later, I can still understand how a prisoner feels as he heads for the electric chair.”

* Never fails: Every time we mention guys stopping to help a female motorist in distress (see last Friday’s Slice), someone calls and says “Bet she’s good-looking.”

* You haven’t already won $50,000: But it could happen. Call 1-888-WE-GIGGLE to enter the Pillsbury Doughboy Giggle-Off.

But before phoning, you might want to alert other members of your household. That way, they won’t automatically assume that you’ve finally lost it.

* Slice answer: Several readers spotted the trick question in Tuesday’s Slice. It was the one asking how many Idahoans it takes to wash a truck. “Everybody knows Idahoans don’t wash their pickups,” said one.

* Early warning: The National Society of Professional Engineers’ Annual Meeting will be held in Spokane this summer. More than 700 engineers are expected.

The keynote address will be entitled “Liberal Arts Majors — Huuh! Good God Y’all, What Are They Good For?”

* Today’s Slice question: What Inland Northwest resident has the most frequently imitated voice?