Charming Won’T Cut It This Time
Whoa, Nellie.
We won’t even touch on his repeated use of the charming term “gimpy.” But retiring sports announcer/famous WSU grad Keith Jackson was dead wrong Monday night when he said during the broadcast of the Trademarked Salty Snacks Bowl that it’s nobody’s business how much money big-time college football coaches make.
1. A state university is a public institution. If one cent of tax money goes toward a coach’s salary, the right to privacy is out the window. (Even if most of his income is from TV contracts, shoe deals, alumni slush funds and other perversions of the school’s mission.)
2. Knowing how much money top-level college coaches get paid is a healthy reminder of how messed up society’s priorities have become.
Choose a “Euro”-like name for a currency that would be used only in Eastern Washington and North Idaho:
a. The Lake.
b. The Inner.
c. The Koot.
d. The Spoke.
e. other.
Six of the things that are wrong with the world: 1. Too many lists.
2. Media obsession with the media.
3. The three-point shot.
4. Recipes that don’t call for nearly enough onion.
5. The mismatch between many Spokane area brains and the requirements of winter driving.
6. Too many movies set in Los Angeles.
Slice answer: Kathy Berrigan finished our little Palouse saga by having Vegie the hawk divert the hungry owl’s attention to the bad squirrels down from Spokane while Thornton and Steptoe hop on a passing plow and make their getaway.
Broadcast news: Which of the following most closely resembles something you have thought upon first seeing a new-hire Spokane TV journalist on the screen:
a. “She’s too good-looking. She’ll never stay here.”
b. “Where on Earth did they find this one?”
c. “Is it just that I’m getting old, or do all these people look 17?”
d. “This, truly, is total news coverage I can depend on.”
e. “Mute button, don’t fail me now.”
Q and A: A caller asked why there’s not an annual open house at Slice Headquarters.
That’s simple. Many of our readers would never get past security.
Today’s Slice question: Are you shy about shaking hands during the winter because yours tend to be so cold that people often react with alarm to your skin temperature?