Don’T Believe Everything You…
In a classroom exercise dealing with “Well-Known Proverbs,” some third-graders at Spokane’s Hutton Elementary were asked to fill in the blanks at the end of 15 familiar sentences.
Some of the kids’ answers were fairly predictable. For instance, “Better to be safe than…sorry.”
“No news is…good news.”
“You can’t teach an old dog new…tricks.”
But others were a bit more, um, creative.
“Strike while the…band is playing.”
“Never underestimate the power of…reading.”
“You can lead a horse to water but…never go in.”
“Don’t bite the hand that…is dirty.”
“If you lie down with the dogs, you’ll…get licked.”
“An idle mind is…good.”
“Two’s company, three’s…company.”
“The pen is mightier than the…penciel.”
“A penny saved is…lost.”
* Speaking of familiar expressions: Looks like it’s time to say goodbye to the slogan “Good Paper.”
So long. It’s been swell.
But let’s not get too down. Instead, let’s have a contest.
We’ll send a Voodoo Lou’s Office Voodoo Kit — “Take charge of your career with Voodoo!” — to the reader faxing or e-mailing (pault@spokesman.com) the best take-off on the paper’s new promo line, “Wake Up and Read It.”
Entries must have arrived by the time we get to work on Monday morning. (And more than a few surprised callers know that’s early.)
* Bloomsday training mottoes: “Doomsday Hill — never have, never will.” — Karen Mathison
“Eat now, pay later.” — Jerry Porter
“Prepare for the carb-up now with a six-pack a day.” — Mike Schieche
* Don’t lei it on too thick: Making a show of pronouncing Hawaiian place names is one way to make co-workers wish you were still on vacation.
* Some things should be seen and not heard: Er, something like that. In any case, trying for a Jan. 1, 2000 baby is not a sign that you understand the full nature of parenthood.
* More telltale signs that you have, in fact, stopped rockin’:
1. You spend a lot of time talking about couches.
2. You use a highlighter on your copy of TV Week.
3. You go to bed at about the same time most first-graders do.
4. You take pride in knowing how to keep a toilet from overflowing.
* Today’s Slice question (complete this sentence): “Spokane is about…”