Bad Attitudes Could Derail The Naysayers

Sat., Feb. 5, 2000

By Paul Turner srpaulturner@gmail.com

It’s never too early to start thinking up nicknames for your softball team.

Sometimes the name of the sponsoring business will suggest something. You know, the Metro Cafe Mets or Miller’s Hardware Hammers. Failing that, a nickname that has a regional flavor can work. And then there are team names that don’t make sense but sound good.

Here are a few possibilities, just to get you started … 1. Camper Shells. 2. Battlin’ Book Clubbers. 3. Pawn Tickets. 4. Fighting Naysayers. 5. South Hill Mothers Who Think. 6. Home Schoolers. 7. Lentilheads. 8. The People At Work Who Believe They Know How Everyone Else Could Do Their Jobs Better. 9. Gated Community Tigers. 10. Expos. 11. SUV Rationalizers. 12. Lyin’ Litigants. 13. Catch ‘n’ Releasers. 14. STA Plaza Parolees. 15. Snowboard Keglers. 16. Foley Voters. 17. Red Birkenstocks. 18. Lake Homeless. 19. Fighting Nonsexoffenders. 20. Valley Encore Brides. 21. Conservatives Against Things. 22. The Idaho Relatives. 23. Palouse Fightin’ Wheaties. 24. Parking Garage Band. 25. Tank Top Marmots.

* Relationship exercise suggested by Cathy Dennie: What TV couple do the two of you most resemble?

* Apocalyptic Vision of the Future No. 45: Currency becomes worthless. And in the Spokane area, people agree to regard old Auntie’s bookmarks as money.

* Slice answer: Karen Wiebers sends newspaper clippings to a friend in China who teaches English to teenagers. “It amazes me how interested these students are in how we live,” said Wiebers.

* Springtime for Mel Brooks: “The Producers,” a 1968 movie with several insanely funny moments, is on TCM tonight. Check listings.

But be forewarned. You could wind up humming a ridiculous song.

* Four things you can’t blame on the Spokane City Council:

1. Linda Stratton won’t go out with you.

2. Hip-hop fashion.

3. Log-splitting injuries.

4. Someone keyed your new rig.

* There’s no day like Saturday for facing the truth and saying: “I have become a Spokane cultural cliche.”

* Warm-up question: What employed person in the Spokane area is least likely to ever want to purchase the products or use the services for which his or her business is responsible?

* Today’s Slice question: Where in the Inland Northwest would you stand if it was your hope that eventually you would see 99 percent of the region’s residents pass by?

Local journalism is essential.

Give directly to The Spokesman-Review's Northwest Passages community forums series -- which helps to offset the costs of several reporter and editor positions at the newspaper -- by using the easy options below. Gifts processed in this system are tax deductible.

Meet Our Journalists

Jesse Tinsley

Meet Jesse Tinsley. As a certified drone pilot, this veteran Spokesman-Review photographer often can be seen capturing beautiful aerial photographs of our region. Sometimes though, the job requires getting down with the dogs.
Jim Meehan

Jim Meehan is no stranger to Zag Nation. As the lead writer covering the Gonzaga men’s basketball team, he tells the stories behind the game and gets fans a bit closer to their favorite players.
Molly Quinn

There is no artist in Spokane like Molly Quinn. Her whimsical style is instantly recognizable to readers of The Spokesman-Review. She has painted gorgeous illustrations that instantly elevate the journalism accompanying it. She brings to life the stories that defy photography. She makes our pages better.
Rob Curley

Spokesman-Review editor Rob Curley loves to talk with people and learn about their lives, whether it's a best-selling author or a stranger he meets downtown on his walk to lunch. It's that inquisitive nature combined with a playful sense of storytelling that helps make our newspaper different than most.