Take Care With Those Addresses

Thu., Jan. 20, 2000

By Paul Turner srpaulturner@gmail.com

After The Slice asked about unexpected Internet finds, several readers described how typing mistakes had been gateways to porn.

For instance, a guy trying to call up a stock-market page hit one wrong key and soon found himself staring at an XXX offering “Voted the most hardcore site on the net!”

* For whom the bell tolls: Carillonneur Andrea McCrady came down from the tower at St. John’s Cathedral Sunday morning looking a bit wide-eyed.

The wild weather had produced amazing winds and almost tornado-like pressure changes. There was even lightning.

And from her perch high up in the South Hill church, McCrady had fleetingly entertained the notion that she might be in the midst of her final carillon performance.

But as the wind ripped past the tower and the windows flexed in an ominous way, one thought consoled her.

If she had to go, what better place to be?

* Change the channel: Spokane cable TV subscribers with digital interactive set-ups are familiar with the ability to press the “Information” button on the remote and then see a short text block describing the program.

But, as always, you can’t believe everything you read.

Maybe it has been fixed by now. But in recent days, requesting information on “The Andy Griffith Show” produced this puzzling on-screen synopsis of the familiar doings in Mayberry: “Series about Andy Sawyer, acting mayor of a small town.”

What? Andy Sawyer?

This might not seem so odd if Sheriff Andy Taylor weren’t one of the most famous characters in television history.

We can’t wait to see what the cable folks will come up with next.

“The Honeymooners” — Series about yuppie ad executive Ralph Kramden, set in Malibu.

“Bewitched” — Buxom twentysomething solves crimes with the help of her futuristic sidekick.

“Mod Squad” — British teens mumble.

“Bonanza” — Ranch family adjusts to the presence of a wisecracking dolphin.

“Seinfeld” — The body count climbs as cute emergency room docs learn about love.

* Warm-up question for Trekkies: What would one encounter in a “Spokane 2000” holodeck program?

* Today’s Slice question: What thought flashed through your mind during that split-second after you had put your right foot in the car and your left foot was just starting to slip on a patch of ice?

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