He’S In No Hurry To Answer That Call
Musician/radio personality Verne Windham thinks it’s a bit suspicious that after his battle with cancer became public, he started receiving unsolicited sales calls from funeral homes.
On the other end of the spectrum, he reports that the outpouring of community concern and affection has been rather overwhelming.
* Children’s road-trip car games that never really caught on:
1. “Smack Me — I See an SUV.”
2. “Something to Cry About.”
3. “Bobby Ate This.”
4. “Make Montana End.”
5. “Spank the County Seats.”
6. “Countin’ Caitlyns.”
7. “Stepmom, Go Away.”
8. “One, Two, Three, Burp.”
9. “Make Dad Lose It.”
10. “Picking the Scablands.”
* Real-life Spokane parenting tip: Before panicking about your child’s whereabouts, see if he or she is asleep in bed.
* Slice Index of Lifestyle Satisfaction: Are you getting enough charred meat to suit you? Yes/No.
Does the treehouse next door hang right over your deck? Yes/No.
* You know it’s almost summer when … : People start looking askance at even mildly productive co-workers.
* Sports moment missed while in the restroom: “My son has played football for 11 years and I never have missed a game,” wrote Sam DeCaro. “This year he was a senior at Rogers High School and played lineman.
“When Rogers was playing Shadle Park High School at Joe Albi Stadium, I got up to go to the bathroom with 30 seconds left until halftime.”
Big mistake.
When DeCaro returned from the restroom, everybody congratulated him on his son’s touchdown.
It seems a Shadle Park player had fumbled a punt and David DeCaro recovered the ball for a score.
His dad can only shake his head at the memory. “His one and only touchdown — and I missed it.”
* Five things certain young people mistakenly believe their generation invented: 1. Hormonal urges.
2. Moping and dressing in black.
3. Atonal music.
4. Traffic-taunting jaywalking as an expression of rebellious spirit.
5. A ridiculously liberal interpretation of what can be called a “sun dress” in the name of going out with practically nothing on.
* Warm-up question: If you like a TV show and it doesn’t get canceled, does that mean you have bad taste?
* Today’s Slice question: Does premarital camping tend to lead to wedding cancellations?