Probably Sounds A Bit Fishy
Somewhere out there, in a land far away, someone is talking about his summer vacation destination.
And listeners are trying to visualize a place called Coeur d’Alene.
* Two-step personality-improvement course: 1) It’s normal to occasionally grumble about Spokane’s real or imagined limitations. But it’s important to include yourself in the picture and not come off sounding as if you believe you are too good to live here.
2) Do not presume to give others advice about their personalities.
* Slice answer: The question was “Gas grill or coals?”
“Wood!” wrote Carla Danielson of Colfax. “It’s a lost art. My husband Keith had a high-school friend make him a monster of a BBQ in metal shop … There is nothing like it.”
* Starring roll: “As my daughter and I were leaving our seats at the Spokane Opera House recently, we spied a full roll of toilet paper on an empty seat,” wrote Diane Hanks. “I would love to hear an explanation.”
Hmmmm. Not so sure we would.
* Just wondering: Ever witness someone saying “Yes, I know a reason why these two people shouldn’t get married”?
* Memorable sunburns: Susie Mauro had just finished applying sunscreen to her kids when she gave shirtless husband Steve a quick hug.
The next day, Steve’s back was sunburned except for two perfectly white hand prints right in the middle.
And during the summer before ninth grade back in the early ‘80s, a woman we’ll just call Tina used duct tape to create a big nontanned “A” on her torso. That was in honor of a boy named Aaron who soon turned his attention to a different girl.
* Listing to one side of Thursday:
1. Local TV news will be the last entertainment medium to cling to the belief that sincerity can be faked.
2. Celebrities almost never help you clean out the garage.
3. Some people who think of themselves as having a winning flirting style are delusional.
4. At some point, escalating shopping-cart sizes get ridiculous.
5. Certain phone behaviors prove that most people are lousy actors.
6. Which musical genre places the most emphasis on performers’ looks?
7. Listening to travel snobs compete is like being at a good zoo.
8. Couples who can’t agree about Cheapest Airfare vs. Sanest Itinerary seldom stay together.
9. Women would rule if they spent less time thinking about their hair.
10. “SUV” is not a swimsuit style.
* Today’s Slice question: Assuming it’s an average news day, how would the Wake-Up Review play the story if you got run over by an STA bus?
This sidebar appeared with the story:
The Slice appears Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098; e-mail pault@spokesman.com. Farmer tans are a badge of honor.