Rules Will Relax Once Parents Do
Let’s start with an oral report.
Here are the stages parents appear to go through when babies are in that mode of relentlessly putting things in their mouths.
1. Scrupulously vigilant. “No!”
2. More relaxed. “Uh unh, Khaiteluhn. That ducky’s been on the STA Plaza floor 438 times now.”
3. Whatever. “As long as it’s not sharp, toxic or plugged in.”
* Slice answers: Bob Neubauer suggested “A Tryst in the Mist of the Falls” as a title for a romance novel set in Spokane.
Sandpoint’s Teri Maurice said “Do You Believe In Magic?” and “Like a Rolling Stone” are two songs that remind her of that youthful “the future is your oyster” feeling.
Mary McDonnell suspects that most area residents would regard as weird her belief that huckleberries should be used as fertilizer.
Regarding the question about cellular fibbing, David Robison was at Goodwill when he heard a woman holding up a black dress say to her daughter on the phone that she was at Nordstrom and had found something the girl might like.
And in the matter of personalities undergoing transformations when the boss shows up, we received this:
There once was a worker named Patty,
Who drove all her co-workers batty!
When the Boss appeared in the door,
All she did was adore!
So, the boss thought most highly of Patty.
* Readers’ lifestyle observations:
1. If you drive fast, trash in the back of your pickup magically disappears.
2. It seems to be a requirement that local TV commercials include dogs.
3. You’re not a newcomer if you remember Stan & Ollie’s french fries.
4. Some Cub Scouts cuss too much.
* Leighton McClaskey wonders: “What is the strangest message that has ever wandered onto your answering machine or e-mail?”
He once heard the following on his own answering machine: “Hey, Ted. I’m leaving soon. So please pick me up at the dock at Nantucket at 7:00. Thanks a lot. (click).”
McClaskey, a Post Falls resident, would have had to rush to get to New England in time to fill in for Ted.
* Redefining cold: A delightful letter from 92-year-old Eva Eagle included some remarkable recollections of using the outhouse late at night in the dead of winter. “Believe me, you didn’t stay there long,” she wrote.
Her letter made us realize that outhouses are an integral part of our Inland Northwest heritage that The Slice has neglected. Perhaps we should rectify that oversight.
Heard that.
* Today’s Slice question: What’s it like living with someone who is trying to quit smoking?