Reader Did Wonderful Dreamwork

Thu., Oct. 5, 2000

Nancy Huseby Bloom The Spokesma

Dear Nancy: Six years ago my husband and I retired and moved to a small community.

We love each other and this new lifestyle very much but were both perfectionists and are quick to judge and micro-manage each others behavior. Recently I found myself so angry with my husband that I was seriously considering therapy to help me deal with the rage. Meanwhile, my husband had become withdrawn and quiet, trying not to quarrel with me. At this point I had the following dream.

My husband and I are in a large public building, an institution of some kind. I’ve lost him, so I go out the door alone. I begin to walk down a steep road, which is a slippery slope covered with water and debris. A police officer directs me to the right side of the road.

I realize I’ve forgotten my sweater and turn back up the hill to retrieve it. I pass a small wedding pavilion. Inside are a bride and a groom. He is holding the bride’s hands in both of his, lovingly pressing them against his heart, saying, “I want you to be the woman I married. I love her.”

I realize then that the groom is my husband and that he is in love with another woman. I am filled with fear and an overpowering sense of loss. Then I see there is a book on the altar. On the dark green cover is the number eight within the outline of a heart. I am curiously comforted and wake up from the dream.

After a few minutes reflection I began to see how this dream connected to the difficulties we were experiencing in our marriage. My anger toward him was causing me to want to leave the institution of marriage but doing something that rash would put me on a very slippery slope. Only after I thought I’d lost his love did I fully realize how much he means to me and how much I want to be that bride held close to his heart. The dream also revealed how much my husband loves me and would like to have our relationship return to our early loving years. I tearfully shared this dream and my feelings with my husband that morning, telling him how sad I was to think I may lose his love and how much I wanted to be that bride he loved so dearly. I told him I thought the number eight was a symbol of eternity, and together with the heart, was a sign of the eternal love we have for one another, despite our current difficulties.

It’s been about a month since I had this dream and it has completely changed the dynamics in our relationship. My anger has simply dissolved like a mist. Since then we have spent every day in harmony, even though we had to face some stressful extended family problems. Dreams are powerful friends and I think I owe the rest of my happily married life to this one! - Marilyn

Dear Marilyn: This dream was a huge wake up call! You did a wonderful job with your dreamwork and I admire the way you let your resistance fall away so that you could share it with your husband. I’m sure he’s feeling relieved now that your relationship is back on the right track. By the way, that policeman guided you to the right side of the road. Police in dreams often represent the dreamers conscience or the Higher Self, directing us in the right direction.

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