Shuffling through life’s choices

Don’t get me wrong. Choice is good. I believe in choice. It’s better to have many choices in life instead of none at all.

Yet the fact remains: Choice is overrated.

If I had to choose, I’d say too much choice is the curse of our modern world. Choice is a massive time-waster. Choice is a leading cause of ulcers.

And you don’t want to get an ulcer, because then you will have to buy medicine. And if you are on Medicare, that means you will have to choose one of dozens of new prescription drug plans, which are very complicated, which is why Medicare has to send buses full of consultants out into the hinterlands (i.e., here) to help people choose.

With this many choices, the only responsible path is to carefully study each plan’s provisions in relation to your own needs and usage requirements, then close your eyes and jab your finger down randomly on the list.

Who can figure out all of the variables of co-pays and deductibles? All you really want to do is get rid of your ulcer, which is now throbbing worse than ever.

Modern life is overloaded with choices. Let me give you a common example, here in the Christmas shopping season. Let’s say you want to buy a computer. You can’t just walk into a store and say, “Gimme a computer.”

You have to decide:

What kind of processor you want.

What kind of operating system you want.

What kind of screen you want: flat or whatever a nonflat one is called.

What kind of DVD burner you want, R or RW?

What are your gig requirements?

What are your SDRAM parameters?

So, if you’re like me, you research all of these questions painstakingly in Consumer Reports and “Buying Computers for Dummies” and settle on a model with all of the correct features. Then you walk into the store and the sales associate says, “Uhh, we don’t got that one,” and so you point to whatever box is nearby and say, “OK, gimme that one. Or whatever one you have.”

And you get it home and it’s just fine because you honestly didn’t have any idea what your SDRAM parameters were anyway.

And have you tried to buy a camera lately? It is no longer possible to simply walk into a camera store and say, “I’ll take a Brownie.” Now you have to make decisions about how many megapixels you want and how much optical zoom you want, as opposed to digital zoom. Also, be prepared to ponder issues of storage and battery recharging.

Then there’s radio. Even in a middle-sized market like Spokane, you can choose from a couple of dozen over-the-air formats, including both Adult Contemporary and something called Hot Adult Contemporary.

But take a look at satellite radio. That’s where the options have multiplied like newts in love. Sirius has channels labeled Early Classic Rock, Later Classic Rock, Deeper Classic Rock, Classic Hard Rock, Classic Alternative, The ‘50s, The ‘60s, The ‘70s, The ‘80s, Classic Soul, Old Skool Rap, Classic Country and Swingin’ Standards. And we haven’t even explored the ‘90s yet.

I find that kind of choice exhilarating – for a while. Before long, you get weary of asking yourself every day, “Do I feel like Later Classic Rock? Or Deeper Classic Rock?”

No, after a while, you just want to say, “I don’t care. Surprise me.”

Tellingly, Sirius also has a channel called “Super Shuffle” which does just that: surprise you. It plays songs randomly from many of its 100-plus formats.

Meanwhile a huge part of the iPod’s appeal is that you can set it on shuffle and it will pick songs randomly from the hundreds or thousands you have downloaded. In a world overloaded with choice, the iPod is saying these comforting words: “Don’t worry. I’ll pick the songs.”

All you have to do is say, “Hey! I love this song!” in a surprised and delighted voice, forgetting that you’re the one who downloaded it in the first place.

Too bad “shuffle” doesn’t work in the rest of life. I’ll bet there are plenty of seniors who would be more than happy to step onto that Medicare bus and say, “Go ahead. Surprise me.”