Lots of reasons to celebrate your status as single

It’s the summer of parties, and we all love a party, except when they’re all for couples or babies. Don’t get me wrong, I support my friends and attend each. But I have to ask, why aren’t there any parties for single people or even couples who aren’t married, celebrating their status?

The fictional goddess of columnists, Carrie Bradshaw from “Sex in the City,” explored this concept one episode. It was a sad day for fans when the show ended last year, but luckily the lessons the characters taught us, namely to embrace where we are and to live in the moment, live on through DVDs.

I recently watched one of my favorite episodes: when the girls celebrate another baby shower. Being in my 30s too, you get invited to a lot of baby showers and some weddings. You attend them all because that’s what friends do. But when something bad happened at the “Sex in the City” shower (Carrie’s $400 Manolo Blanicks shoes were stolen after the host made the guests leave their shoes in the foyer, in fear her children would pick up something bad from outside), Carrie questioned how much money and time she had spent celebrating events in this friend’s life.

Her wedding shower, the wedding and three showers for each of her children. The money didn’t bother her as much as realizing if you’re single, there are no parties celebrating anything. No one celebrates your status because there’s nothing “formal or special” that happens to single people. How true that is – not that nothing important happens but that no one recognizes or celebrates it.

After asking her friend to pay for half of her Manolo Blanicks that were stolen at the party, her friend responded, “Carrie I’m not like you and single and can indulge in such luxuries anymore. My life has meaning now that I’m married and have a family.”

Now, Carrie was ticked about the money she had spent, but it didn’t hurt as much as her pride. Her life had plenty of meaning without a husband and a family. Her successful career, great friends and other personal accomplishments made her life very meaningful. Still though, like many of us, she cried that afternoon for what she didn’t have, or was still searching for. Then she did what you need to do after a fall: picked herself back up and celebrated her life as it was.

She began by calling the Manolo Blanicks’ store and registering her shoes as the gift she wanted. She called her friend and left a message that she was celebrating being single and was registered at that store. The episode ended with her friend sending the shoes to Carrie. The card said, “Congratulations. We’re very happy for you.”

Don’t you just love that?

This weekend I will be hosting a wedding shower for a friend, who said she’d be doing the same for me when my divorce was final. After the emotion and tears of this past year, it will feel great to celebrate. And why shouldn’t we celebrate the end of something like we do the beginning? It’s a new and exciting chapter in my life – granted a very painful and emotional journey getting there, which is another reason to celebrate where I will be then and where I’m headed.