Arrow-right Camera
The Spokesman-Review Newspaper

The Spokesman-Review Newspaper The Spokesman-Review

Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883
Cloudy 33° Cloudy
News >  Features

Kids only

The Spokesman-Review

Pssst! Kids! This story is just for you.

We know a trip isn’t really successful until you get a parent to utter the immortal words, “If you don’t stop that, I am going to pull this car over right now. I’m not kidding.”

Some parents are easier to break than others. Some make rookie mistakes, like giving you caffeine before strapping you in. But with these simple steps, you will be able to annoy even the most mellow folks.

This is a simple 9-point plan to drive parents crazy.

Enjoy. (And don’t tell them you heard these from us.)

“ Place your index finger, also known as a “pointer,” millimeters from a sibling’s arm, head or nose. When he or she complains, just keep saying, “I’m not touching. I’m not touching.”

“ Here’s a classic: the simple repetition of the phrase “Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?” It’s both annoying and inquisitive, the latter a trait parents generally like to encourage.

“ Gently, randomly kick the seat in front of you. Enough said.

“ Make up your own rap about your parent. “My Mom’s so lame, I know it’s true. She’s wearing purple along with blue … yeah, she’s lame. So lame … “

“ Flatulence noises are always an attention getter.

“ Repeat everything someone else says. (Everything someone else says.) It gets old fast. (It gets old fast.)

“ Sing Britney Spears’ songs. Better yet, go on and on about how she’s your role model.

“ Request the same CD over and over. If it includes songs like “Do Your Ears Hang Low?” all the better.

“ If you have multiple siblings, make it a point never to go to the bathroom at the same time. For pure family fun, there’s nothing like making the parents stop every 30 minutes.

The Spokesman-Review Newspaper

Local journalism is essential.

Give directly to The Spokesman-Review's Northwest Passages community forums series -- which helps to offset the costs of several reporter and editor positions at the newspaper -- by using the easy options below. Gifts processed in this system are not tax deductible, but are predominately used to help meet the local financial requirements needed to receive national matching-grant funds.

Active Person

Subscribe now to get breaking news alerts in your email inbox

Get breaking news delivered to your inbox as it happens.