Rock of ages still inspiring modern music

Before last month’s Grammys, much was made of Kanye West’s hit single “Jesus Walks,” which snared a Grammy as best rap song. Part of the buzz concerned the fact that Jesus was mentioned prominently, a rarity for non-gospel songs.

A few J-tunes have cracked the charts – “Personal Jesus” by Depeche Mode and ZZ Top’s version of “Jesus Just Left Chicago” come to mind – but most have never risen beyond obscurity. And although they might not qualify as background music for Easter dinner, here are a few noteworthy ones.

The group King Missile said it all with “Jesus Was Way Cool”: “He could’ve played guitar better than Hendrix/ He could’ve told the future/ He could’ve baked the most delicious cake in the world/ He could’ve scored more goals than Wayne Gretzky/ He could’ve danced better than Baryshnikov/ Jesus could have been funnier than any comedian you can think of/ Jesus was way cool.”

“Are You Drinking With Me, Jesus?,” written by Peter Berryman, includes the classic verse: “Should we take a taxi home, Jesus/ Or should we simply hoof it from here?/ I know you can walk on water/ But can you walk on this much beer?”

Then there was Warren Zevon’s “Jesus Mentioned,” about unearthing Elvis Presley: “Can’t you just imagine/ Digging up the King/ Begging him to sing/ About those heavenly mansions/ Jesus mentioned.”

Toby Keith sang “Jesus Gets Jealous of Santa Claus”: “She wasn’t happy like angels ought to be/ She was cryin’ when she gave me the message/ For all the world to hear/ You know that Jesus gets jealous of Santa Claus/ Sometimes this time of year.”

And Kinky Friedman regaled audiences with his “They Ain’t Making Jews Like Jesus Anymore”: “I said, ‘Has it occurred to you, you nerd, that that’s not very nice/ We Jews believe it was Santa Claus that killed Jesus Christ.’ “

In our book, winners all.