Friend to Friend brightens life in care centers

Frances Opitz, 75, had regretted not spending time with her mother, who lingered in a Texas nursing home.

Now, under the Friend to Friend of Greater Spokane program, she has become a regular visitor at Avalon Care Center in north Spokane.

On a recent visit, Lynn Kelly, a 69-year-old resident of Avalon, was waiting in the lobby for Opitz. A victim of a stroke, Kelly has difficulty speaking.

She and Optiz communicate with smiles and gestures.

But one sentence she spoke was quite clear.

“I love you,” she said and signed while beaming at Opitz.

From the lobby Optiz went to the room of 98-year-old Blanche Grandlund.

“How’s the weather out there?” Grandlund asked.

Established in 1979, Friend to Friend is a nonprofit organization dedicated to providing companionship for lonely residents in long-term care facilities. Volunteer coordinator Jan Kendrick works with activity directors to match volunteers with residents who need visitors.

“There’s a great need for visitors in long-term care facilities,” Kendrick said.

The program has about 50 volunteers, who are asked to make a one-year commitment, to visit at least twice a month.

Linda Godfrey, a Friend to Friend board member, has spent 35 years working in assisted- and skilled-living facilities. She estimates 15 to 20 percent of residents don’t have regular visitors.

“Staff can only do so much,” she said. From the residents’ perspective, the days are long and lonely.

“It’s vital for them to feel like someone’s taking an interest in them,” she said.

Liberty Lake resident Frank Sell, a volunteer since 1999, and his wife, Sharon, are weekly visitors at Spokane Valley Good Samaritan Village, and they bring two English setters. The dogs are a big hit with the nonverbal residents, whose smiles speak volumes as the dogs lavish kisses on them.

“My wife and I have benefited far more than any of the residents,” Sell said. The residents have become like family to them, he said.

Volunteer friends don’t just sit and chat. Sell has a long-running checkers game going with his friend at Good Samaritan.

Other volunteers take their friends out to lunch or to a ball game. The organization encourages families with children to volunteer as well.

Karen Gairson, activities director for St. Joseph’s Care Center in south Spokane, said the Friend to Friend program is especially beneficial for residents who have no family members in the area.

Each Tuesday, Connie Miles, a 26-year volunteer and current board member, visits St. Joseph’s. Her first stop on a recent visit was Karen Munk’s room.

Miles pulled up a chair and chatted with Munk while she helped her sort her mail.

Then it was on to the room of 55-year-old Linda Lemming.

“Once a week I can plan on her coming,” Lemming said. On this day Miles brought Lemming a big bag of M&Ms.

They laughed and bantered in the easy way of longtime friends.

Then Lemming grew serious.

“It’s hard living here,” she said. “Connie’s my shoulder to lean on. We laugh and cry and have a lot of fun.

“She’s a beautiful person.”

Lemming reached out and held Miles’ hand.

“She’s a good friend,” Lemming said.