Women’s excuses can be convincing
Dear Annie: I read the letter from “Bossier City, La.,” asking for excuses women give for not having sex with their husbands.
Nowadays, most women work 40-plus hours a week, then come home and cook, clean and take care of kids. Why shouldn’t we be “too tired” for sex? My husband and I try to have sex at least three times a week in spite of our schedules. I love him dearly, and he knows it. I don’t look for excuses to not have sex, because I have a very understanding husband. “Bossier” needs to mind his own business. – Need Eight Hours of Sleep in Kentucky
Dear Kentucky: We’re sorry to say, we heard a lot of excuses from a lot of readers. See how yours measure up:
From Hainesville, Ill.: Some years ago, my wife and I were in front of the TV in our den, and I began to get amorous. She said, “Let’s stay up and watch the late movie. I’m too tired to go to bed.”
Michigan: At first, sex was uncomfortable. Then it became painful. My husband thought I was rejecting him. A checkup revealed that I had uterine cancer. I had surgery, and all is well. Ladies, please check with your doctor if you are experiencing pain during sex. It could save your life.
New York: My wonderful husband thinks it’s funny to pass loud and odorous gas. It completely turns me off, and he knows it. He has no gastrointestinal problems. He’s just a little too proud of something that should be saved for the guys.
Jacksonville, Fla.: Years ago, I tried the “not tonight, I have a headache” excuse. My husband promptly replied, “I promise not to touch your head.”
Louisville, Ky.: Fourteen years ago, my wife’s response to a request for intimacy was, “God gave you two perfectly good hands.” We live like brother and sister. When the kids turn 18, I’m sure we’re done.
New York: Why don’t I want sex this morning? Honey, I’ve asked you before to brush your teeth. Your mouth is foul and sticky, especially after chewing tobacco the night before. I was quietly insulted the first few times. Now I’m turned off.
Midwest: I will tell my husband that I already showered and don’t want to waste water and spend time doing my hair and getting dressed again. It usually works, and he only needs to wait a day at the most.
Michigan: I recently purchased new bedding. The first night we used it, I was really not in the mood, so when my husband tried to be intimate, I said, “Not tonight, dear. The sheets are brand-new.”
Louisiana: It has been five long years since I have had sex with my husband. I told the jerk straight up, “I don’t trust you, and I don’t want to have sex with you.” It’s lonely, but I am disease free. He isn’t.