Stepmama’s family?
And the next desperate housewife is … would you believe Carol Burnett?
The 72-year-old comedy legend is coming to ABC’s “Desperate Housewives” as the uptight stepmother of equally uptight Bree Van De Kamp (Marcia Cross).
“I thought this would be a hoot,” Burnett says. “I’m a soap opera fan. I’ve watched ‘All My Children’ for a hundred years, and this, too, is a very campy soap.”
For his part, says “Housewives” creator Marc Cherry, “I learned how to be funny watching Carol Burnett.”
He described her new character as “a very tightly wound, proper lady for whom appearances mean everything.
“A lot of what Bree has become came from this woman,” Cherry says, adding that their relationship is “polite but strained.”
Burnett is scheduled to appear in one episode, April 9, but could return next season.
Don’t show him up
Dave Chappelle says he may never return to Comedy Central if it goes through with plans to air new, half-finished episodes of “Chappelle’s Show,” calling it “kind of a bully move.”
Last May, the comedian stunned his fans and the entertainment industry by skipping out on a $50 million contract and leaving “Chappelle’s Show” in mid-production. Comedy Central has announced plans to air episodes based on the material he had filmed.
Chappelle said his possible return is still up in the air, “but I think if they air that stuff, I can’t see how I’m going to be able to. That will damage our relationship.”
Busted on by Busta?
Busta Rhymes and his bodyguard have been sued by a fan who says the two men beat him after he asked for the rapper’s autograph.
The bodyguard, Troy Green, was previously charged with third-degree assault, third-degree attempted assault and second-degree harassment in connection with the September 2005 incident. No charges have been filed against Rhymes.
“He was asking for an autograph,” the alleged victim’s lawyer says. “That’s all he was doing. He’s a fan. He wasn’t being a wise guy.”
Critters? Let them be
Designer Stella McCartney launched her fall fashion line on Thursday in Paris, with nary an animal product in sight.
The former Beatle’s daughter is a strict vegetarian like her late mother, Linda, and refuses to use leather or fur in her fashions.
Meanwhile, dad Paul and his second wife, Heather Mills McCartney, spent Thursday on frigid ice floes off the Atlantic Ocean in an attempt to stop Canada’s annual slaughter of weeks-old seal pups for their pelts and blubber.
While people have hunted the seals for hundreds of years, McCartney said, “Plenty of things have been going on for a long time, like slavery. Just because it’s been going on for a long time doesn’t make it right.”
The birthday bunch
Actress Hattie Winston (“Becker”) is 61. Singer Jennifer Warnes is 59. Actor-director Tim Kazurinksy is 56. Singer-guitarist Robyn Hitchcock is 53. Actress Miranda Richardson is 48. Rapper Tone-Loc is 40. Actress Julie Bowen (“Boston Legal”) is 36. Country singer Brett Warren (The Warren Brothers) is 35. Actor David Faustino (“Married … With Children”) is 32. Actress Jessica Biel (“7th Heaven”) is 24.