Kids’ diversity starts early

Few things make a parent cringe faster than their child blurting out a comment when they see a person of different color, someone in a wheelchair or someone speaking a foreign a language.

But it’s in those moments that parents need to realize their reaction helps shape their child’s view of diversity, child development experts say.

“Children may comment on differences in a way that may embarrass us – just use it as a teachable moment,” said Harriet Shaklee, a child development psychologist who helps oversee Parents As Teachers programs affiliated with the University of Idaho Extension Service in Boise.

Parents and early childhood educators across the country are gathering this week at the Parents as Teachers’ “Understanding Human Diversity” conference in St. Louis. Participants will learn more about how children develop views on diversity very early in life.

It’s a natural pattern that in itself isn’t hostile, said Diane Demarest, program coordinator of the University of Idaho’s Parents As Teachers program.

“Children, from the time they’re very young, certainly begin to learn differences. First, they learn gender differences. Then color differences.

“And from there, they find other kinds of differences, like religious, ethnic or eye shape,” Demarest said.

However, parents’ messages and reactions to such differences determine their childrens’ attitudes and perceptions of others, experts say.

“There’s a couple of ways we learn to respond to differences: One is fear and the other is inquiry,” said Doug Fagerness, director of the North Idaho College Head Start and Parents As Teachers programs in Coeur d’Alene.

So kids may be blunt when they notice differences.

With practice, parents can learn to turn awkward moments into opportunities for heart-felt talks about ethnicity, other cultures, gender and other diversity issues.

“The idea is to encourage inquiry and interest rather than fear. Fear is an entrée to hate. And that’s not what we want to encourage for our future,” Fagerness said.

Why all the hand-wringing about diversity?

“We live in a global culture. Our children need to grow up and be able to interact with people from all over the world. And if they’re comfortable with that when they’re young, they’ll become contributing members of a global society,” said Betty Burly-Wolf, director of Pioneer School, a private elementary school in Spokane Valley.

The 45 children at Pioneer School include youngsters from Turkey, India, Germany, Vietnam, France, Great Britain, Russia and the United States, she said.

“They grow up playing together and holding hands on the playground – so they think this is normal. It’s the world they live in and it’s a natural part of who they are,” said Burly-Wolf.

Because the Inland Northwest’s population is still predominantly Caucasian, experts suggest parents and teachers introduce people of other cultures to kids through books, movies, music, foods and activities.

“And most communities have events and organizations that foster cross-cultural understanding,” said Shaklee. “Those are good ways to actively engage your children and introduce them to shared values.”

Burly-Wolf said she encourages children to concentrate on the positive characteristics of others as a way to promote tolerance.

“We look at diversity as everyone bringing their own special gifts and talents to contribute to the group. So we look for everybody’s strengths instead of their differences,” she said.