Amazon’s computer apparently just wings it

Some people seek self-knowledge through prayer and meditation. Some seek it through psychotherapy. Others seek it through (shiver) honest introspection.

Yet today, I seek it through computer marketing, which everyone knows is the most perfect path yet invented to discovering the secrets of one’s soul.

So I am making the pilgrimage to Amazon, online book retailer and personal oracle, to find out what they believe speaks to my soul. I click on “Recommended for You” and find at the top:

“ “Fighter Wing: A Guided Tour of an Air Force Combat Wing.”

I was not previously aware that this was my idea of fun beach reading. Yet I am sure that if I read this book, I would find an air combat wing to be a superbly organized fighting machine and a fascinating microcosm of military brotherhood and probably sisterhood, assuming it includes air-women.

Still, I find this slightly surprising, in that I have gone my whole life believing my personal tastes ran more toward “Pig-Hooey,” by P.G. Wodehouse.

So maybe Amazon recommended “Fighter Wing” because of the author. Possibly it was written by one of my favorite British scribes, such as Winston Churchill, Charles Dickens or Agatha Christie?

No, it says here it was written by – Tom Clancy and John Gresham. Sure, I’ve read Clancy, because I am American and I am male. But he doesn’t exactly rank up there among my favorite authors, such as John Gierach, a guy who writes about brook trout.

Let’s see what else makes my “Recommended for You” list. Here’s “Snow Country” and “Thousand Cranes” which are subtle and brooding Japanese novels by Yasunari Kawabata. These make the list because I once ordered his book, “Beauty and Sadness,” which I found so subtle and brooding I wanted to commit hara-kiri.

And here’s something called “The Inheritance of Loss,” by Kiran Desai, which deals with Nepalese independence and is “stunning” and “sumptuous.” I might give that a try, but there’s no guarantee it will be any more sumptuous than “Fighter Wing.”

At least it’ll be a better read than another item on my list: “Spanish Cheese Assortment.”

Apparently, Amazon recommends this because I once ordered the “Italian Cheese Assortment” for my sister’s birthday. I checked with her; she found the cheese “subtle and brooding.”

Maybe this isn’t working too well. Let’s move on to another well-known path to self-knowledge, the “Movies You’ll ♥” list at Netflix.

Once again, the results surprise:

“ Walt Disney’s “Pollyanna,” for my inner 7-year-old girl.

“ “The End of the Century: The Ramones,” for my inner punk rocker.

“ Every Ingmar Bergman movie ever made, for my inner clinical depressive.

I am astonished to learn that I ♥ Bergman movies so much, since the only one I remember watching was “The Seventh Seal.” I recall some guy playing a game of chess with Death and then I dozed off. For all I know, they later switched to Yahtzee.

Now, here’s a show I’ve never heard of: “Noah’s Arc, Season One.”

Oh. How interesting.

It’s a TV series that “follows four African-American gay men in Los Angeles through their relationships, friendships and careers in this original series from the gay TV network Logo.”

I can see how some computer algorithm would choose this for me. Netflix says this movie is recommended because I enjoyed both “Brokeback Mountain” and “HBO’s Rome: Season One.” The logic apparently goes like this: Lonely Wyoming cowboy tragedy, plus bloody Roman Empire epic, equals gay, African-American soap opera.

Well, this has been a fascinating voyage of self-discovery. I never knew my personal predilections were so wide-ranging. I plan to act on some of them right away.

By that, I mean I’m going to immerse myself in the world of an Air Force combat wing. That really does sound interesting.