Father bound to support baby

Dear Annie: I’m 25, and my boyfriend, “Jason,” and I got pregnant despite using birth control. Jason was very happy about it, but when I was three months along, his family convinced him he is not ready to have a baby and he asked me to have an abortion. I said I wouldn’t and told him he was free to walk away if he chose. We never fought, and he said he still loves me but doesn’t want a child. Jason left, and I haven’t heard from him in over a month.

My family and friends are as surprised as I am and say I should ask him for child support. But, Annie, I already told him I wouldn’t. After all, if it were up to him, there would be no baby. On the other hand, he made a lot of promises and then just walked out. What do you think? – Mama To Be

Dear Mama: The two of you created this baby together, and even if Jason doesn’t want it, he is still a father and needs to be responsible for his child. If he prefers not to have a relationship, he should still contribute financially. We hope Jason will step up and do the right thing so you don’t have to drag him to court for child support, but don’t be afraid to demand what is in your child’s best interest.

Dear Annie: I have a question on today’s proper etiquette. I was recently invited to a birthday party. On the invitation, guests were requested to bring a dish and also contribute financially to a money pot for the birthday gal. It seemed a bit presumptuous, but I attended anyway.

Now we have been invited to a wedding, and the invitation (engraved, no less) mentions that a reception will follow, but also requests that we bring a dish.

Somehow, this does not feel proper. If the couple doesn’t have the money to throw a big celebration, shouldn’t they host what they can afford? – Need Input

Dear Need Input: Yes. It is inappropriate for bridal couples to issue invitations and expect the guests to bring their own meals or pay for the privilege of attending. It is not the friends and family who are throwing the party. Those who are paying get to determine the menu and venue, along with all the other details. If the couple can afford a fancy, elegant bash, wonderful. If not, coffee and dessert in the living room is also lovely. Guests should not be asked to supply anything but their company, although gifts (of their own choosing) are appropriate. One of these days, the “paying guests” might decide to move the reception to a bowling alley.