Annie’s Mailbox: Stand up for self, other bullied girls

Dear Annie: I am in the sixth grade, and other kids make fun of me. Last week, I didn’t go to school because I had a headache. I’m sure it’s stress, and it’s making me afraid and affecting my schoolwork.

It started in the first grade. I don’t know why, but they “just felt like it.” Last year was the worst of my life. The kids called me (get ready for a list) fat, stupid, idiot, dumb, worthless, that I am not fit to live and so many other things, I lost count.

One of those girls said in front of the only two friends I have, “Wow, you finally got some friends in what? Five years?” I thought I would just curl up and die. But my friends said they didn’t care what anyone said.

My mom works long hours and always comes home tired, so I don’t want to burden her with what is happening at school. I am 11 and don’t think I can take it much longer. Please help. – Stressed Out in Texas

Dear Stressed: These classmates are bullying you, and you have the right to make it stop. Talk to your mother. She needs to know. Then both of you should talk to the principal and school counselor. (If your mother cannot go with you, do it by yourself.) You are obviously a smart girl, and we can sense a great deal of strength inside. You also have two loyal friends who will stand by you, so please do this, not only for yourself, but for other girls who are being bullied. You can get more information and suggestions through stopbullyingnow.com and bullyonline.org.

Dear Annie: One of my mother’s main goals in life was to instill good, solid religious values in her children. This is an admirable thing. The problem is the way she carried out this goal. It was nothing short of stifling.

I cannot recall any single thing in my life that turned me off to religion more than my mother’s efforts. Why can’t parents realize that shoving religion down the throats of their children will only make them want to run from it?

After much counseling, I am now able to say that my faith is strong, but it is in spite of my mother, not because of her. – Religiously Scarred

Dear Scarred: The best way to instill religious values in one’s children is to set a good example at home and let them see that you live what you preach. Forcing religion on a child invariably creates a backlash, as you have so astutely pointed out. Wise parents know that children are more drawn to what provides comfort and a sense of belonging.