He’s not ready for clean living

Dear Annie: I’ve been married for six years and have two wonderful young children. My husband, 36, is a good man and a great, playful father. He has a wonderful job that has enabled me to quit mine and stay home with my children.

The problem is my husband has a drug addiction. He smokes marijuana every day, all day, before work, after work and during his breaks. When he goes without, he has mood swings and screams and shouts at the boys and me. Our second bathroom has been turned into his personal smoke room. The kids and I are not allowed in, nor do we wish to use it, since he makes no effort to hide his drug paraphernalia.

I knew about his habit before we married, but we were young and I thought he would outgrow it. It is getting harder to cover for Daddy when he goes to the bathroom every 30 minutes. You wouldn’t think he would want this kind of environment for his children. He would never volunteer to go to rehab. I don’t know what to do. – Addict’s Wife

Dear Wife: An addict must be willing to quit before progress can be made, and your husband isn’t there yet. Plus, this is illegal, and if the authorities find out, your children could be removed from your home. You may need to ask your husband to leave until he gets clean. There are support groups for families of drug addicts. Please contact Families Anonymous (familiesanonymous.org) (800) 736-9805 for help. And when your husband wants to rejoin the real world, suggest he try Marijuana Anonymous (marijuana-anonymous.org) at (800) 766- 6779.

Dear Annie: My husband cannot resist looking at pretty women. He has occasionally stopped walking with me so he can take a better look.

I say this is rude and hurtful. It damages my ego as well. My husband sees nothing wrong with it, since he is “only looking.” Is there a time limit on how long a guy should stare? What do you think, Annie? – No Name

Dear No Name: It’s normal for a guy to glance at an attractive woman, but it is not acceptable to look so long that his female companion becomes upset or hurt. Guys who need to ogle should have the decency not to do so when their wives or girlfriends are present.