Wife feels guilty for husband’s poor health

Dear Dr. Gott: First of all, let me tell you how much I enjoy your column. It is the first thing I read in the paper each day.

Now, my husband has a problem, and I have felt guilty since we married 10 years ago. He was a widower and 65 years old. His wife died six years prior to our marriage. She was not well for such a long time and, therefore, they had no sexual contact for six years before she died.

I was not aware that my soon-to-be-husband had problems of that nature. It would not have made any difference to me, as he is the love of my entire life. He felt bad, however, and asked his doctor for Viagra. He took one pill, and it did not work but soon after he had atrial fibrillation. He could not stand long pants on his legs, had to have the air moving at all times and has been lightheaded ever since. I think that one pill did it, and I feel bad that he is in terrible health because of me.

He now has lung problems, had atrial fibrillation four times that required having his heart shocked back into rhythm and a pacemaker. He just had a test for diabetes, and, after fasting for 12 hours, it was 240.

Do I stop feeling guilty or could this one Viagra pill have done this to him or at least started his problems?

Dear Reader: I am sorry to learn of your companion’s health problems. I do not believe that Viagra was to blame. Stop feeling guilty, continue to be supportive and revel in the positive features of your life.

To give you related information, I am sending you copies of my Health Report “Living with Diabetes” and “Coronary Artery Disease.” Other readers who would like copies should send a long, self-addressed, stamped envelope and $2 to Newsletter, P.O. Box 167, Wickliffe, OH 44092. Be sure to mention the title.

Dear Dr. Gott: My 39-year-old husband had a vasectomy. Not long after, he started feeling terrible. He had no energy. He went to the doctor, who tested his testosterone levels and ordered a bone scan. The levels were very low, and he had the beginning of osteopenia. He always had lots of energy and was very healthy. Now he can barely function. Do you think that the vasectomy has caused all of his problems?

Dear Reader: I don’t know for sure, but, based on his debilitating symptoms, I doubt it. I suggest that your husband undergo treatment with testosterone. If, after a month or two, he has become “fully charged,” you’ve got your answer: a hormone deficiency. If not, a complete medical work-up would be appropriate.

To give you related information, I am sending you a copy of my Health Report “Understanding Osteoporosis.” Other readers who would like a copy should send a long, self-addressed, stamped envelope and $2 to Newsletter, P.O. Box 167, Wickliffe, OH 44092. Be sure to mention the title.