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Thursday, September 19, 2019  Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883
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News >  Features

Is it near Lake Woy Begone?

By Paul Turner The Spokesman-Review

So it turns out you can’t trust anyone who doesn’t live around here.

Monday, on public radio’s “The Writer’s Almanac,” Garrison Keillor noted the birthday of novelist Marilynne Robinson, but said she was born in “Sandy Point, Idaho.”

•Early warning: With just five weeks until New Year’s day, it’s almost time to start coming up with resolutions.

Here’s one possibility. If you aren’t 14 years old or an idiot, stop rationalizing stupid, insensitive or ego-inflated behavior by saying, “That’s how I roll.”

•Slice answers: According to readers, the Inland Northwest’s epicenter of nonstop dog barking is on the North Side, the South Hill, in Spokane Valley or in Grangeville, Idaho.

One place reportedly not in the running for that title is Spokane County’s dog park near Interstate 90, out by the state line. “Except for traffic sounds, it’s the quietest, most tranquil place you can image,” wrote Liz Cox. “The dogs don’t bark because they’re getting everything they want — fresh air, exercise, and lots of friends of both species playing with them. I even have a dog park koan: What is the sound of 20 tails wagging?”

•Family plan: “Why is it that so many of our retailers use their small children and grandchildren in their advertising?” asks Evelyn Easley, a 74-year-old grandmother. “Granted, most of them are cute kids. But do these people actually think that any sane person is going to purchase a car or appliance just because some 4-year-old is hawking it?”

•It takes all kinds: Judy McKeehan was looking through a catalog when she came across a Christmas ornament shaped like a hand grenade. It was covered with gold glitter. She wrote, “If that doesn’t say ‘Peace on Earth,’ what does?”

•It’s fun to compete: Be the 12th reader to correctly identify “Bash Brannigan” and win a coveted reporter’s notebook.

•Just wondering: How long do you have to live here before you no longer find yourself hearing various Spokane neighborhoods referred to by names you’ve never encountered before?

•It would appear that: There is not one college football analyst on TV who has ever read the definition of the word “destiny.”

•Two for Tuesday: 1. When you consider the positive attributes it implies, a case could be made that hat hair is attractive.

2. OPCC stands for “other people’s Christmas cookies.”

•Today’s Slice question (fill in the blanks): A holiday TV movie based on life in your household would be called either “A Very Special ______” or “The ______ Christmas Ever.”

Wordcount: 416
Tags: The Slice

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