She’s singing, breathing easier

When we last visited Kendra Goodrick-Martinez a month ago, she had started blogging after being subject to a life-changing tug-of-war between Judge John Mitchell and the Kootenai County Prosecutor’s Office. She’s the young woman who turned her life around and is winning her battle with meth addiction. Her baby son gives her the strength to endure weak moments. Last week, she blogged about her battle to slay the nicotine dragon. She breezed through the first few weeks before temptation wafted on the wind outside CdA Target. Until then, she’d been enjoying improvement in her senses of taste and smell. As she strapped baby Jameson into his front pack, however, she smelled cigarette smoke from a nearby woman who was puffing away in the parking lot. “It smelled so pungent and sweet and good, bringing with it all the positive associations I attach to smoking,” Kendra wrote. She came this close to asking the woman for a smoke. Instead, she began singing Jameson a sing-song tune through gritted teeth: “Mommy wants a ciggy-butt/Mommy thinks she’s going nuts!/Give your Mama a nice big hug/And help her squish that ciggybug.” After a few deep breaths, she realized she’d throw away too much hard work for a single drag. Ultimately, she realized that the treatments she’d had for other addictions is serving her well as she fights this one. There’s a lot of superfluous material in the 12-step programs, Kendra said. But there’s also information worth embracing. She has a simple philosophy: “Take what you want and leave the rest.” At this point, she’s taking clean living and leaving cigarette smoking. Some days, it’s easier than others. It depends on which way the wind is blowing.