Ask co-worker to swear less

Dear Annie: My boss, a 25-ish man, has the foulest mouth I’ve ever heard. I’m the only female in a small office that includes five other men. I expect to hear some swearing in an environment where we deal with construction workers, but his mouth is almost too much for me to handle. It doesn’t seem to matter if it is just a casual conversation, if he’s giving me directives or if he’s talking on the phone with clients. He cannot get through a sentence without using the most profane words repeatedly.

I have joked with him about a swear jar, to which he responds, “I’ll just put a $20 in on Monday and that should cover me for the week.” I’ve tried to be more firm, explaining to him how much I detest the F-word, to no avail.

I know that his boss has told him to tone it down a bit, but it isn’t working. His boss is rarely in our office, so he doesn’t hear this nearly as often as I do. I’m not a prude, but I know this is not the right way to conduct yourself in an office setting. The other men in the office swear as well, but none to this extent.

I actually cringe when I see him opening his mouth. It’s almost bad enough to make me quit. What do I do? – Tired of the Potty Mouth

Dear Tired: This man has never been taught to express himself properly and doesn’t realize how rude and juvenile he seems. Now it’s an ingrained bad habit that will take time and effort to correct, but since there has been no consequence for his foul mouth, he doesn’t take the criticisms seriously. Speak to him privately and explain that his language is offensive and you’d appreciate it if he’d make a greater effort to keep the swearing to a minimum. If that doesn’t work, go over his head and let his boss know that the foul language is interfering with your ability to do your job.

Dear Annie: Recently, new neighbors moved in next door. They’re doing a lot to improve the property, which is wonderful. The only negative so far is that the husband is a cigar smoker.

Often, he smokes for several hours at an outdoor table that is less than 20 feet from our deck and right outside our guest bedroom windows.

I would like to approach him and see if we can work something out, but we are concerned that doing so will create a major problem. Please help. – Nauseated on Cape Cod

Dear Cape Cod: Unfortunately for you, your neighbor is permitted to smoke within his own property, inside or out. Your best bet is to make friends. Then, later, you can tactfully ask Mr. Cigar to please puff away farther from your deck and windows.