Best Christmas memories come from giving

Whether one is of the Christian faith or not, at this time of year we all have one thing in common: We are overwhelmed by the commercially driven rat race called the Christmas season.

We all complain about it, but little if any effort is made to actually change the monster that has been created. On Dec. 26 we face the stark realization that the only lasting memories of the entire event our children will retain (likely for a short time) will be whether they got the coolest Hannah Montana doll, the latest video game or a cell phone with all the gadgets.

To those who celebrate the birth of Christ, David O. McKay, the ninth president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, summed it up well:

“True happiness comes only when making others happy – the practical application of the Savior’s doctrine of losing one’s life to gain it. In short, the Christmas spirit is the Christ spirit, that makes our hearts glow in brotherly love and friendship and prompts us to kind deeds of service.”

Around Thanksgiving a few years ago, my in-laws prepared a “Christmas Book” which they gave to us and other family members. It contains 25 stories of selfless giving during the Christmas season – one to be read each day in December leading up to the grand finale of Christmas Day.

My wife has since made copies that are given to our children when they begin their families.

These stories often have touched our heartstrings as we try to teach our children (and remind ourselves) that the most meaningful Christmas memories are about giving – not getting.

The following is one of my favorites, which I have condensed to fit this space. I trust it will touch your soul as it does mine each time I read it. I hope it motivates you and your family to consider a tradition of giving of your own.

“For the Man Who Hated Christmas,” by Nancy W. Gavin, was originally published in the December 14, 1982 issue of Woman’s Day magazine. It was the first place winner in the magazine’s “My Most Moving Holiday Tradition” contest.

The story begins with Gavin’s husband, Mike, informing her that he hated Christmas because of the extreme commercialization. Shortly after that declaration, they attended their 12-year-old son’s wresting match against a team sponsored by an inner-city church.

The opposing team had no safety headgear and wore extremely ragged T-shirts, shorts and shoes – a sharp contrast to the ”spiffy” gear their son’s team wore as they won every match.

Mike, who loved kids and coached several sports, admired the spirit of the church team and wished they had won at least one match. That gave Nancy the inspiration for his Christmas gift.

She visited a sporting goods store, bought an assortment of headgear and wrestling shoes and sent them anonymously to the church.

“On Christmas Eve I placed an envelope on the tree, the note inside telling Mike what I had done and that was his gift from me,” she wrote.

“His smile was the brightest thing about Christmas that year and in the succeeding years. For each Christmas, I followed the tradition – one year sending a group of mentally handicapped youngsters to a hockey game, another year a check to a pair of elderly brothers whose home had burned to the ground the week before Christmas, and on and on.

“The envelope became the highlight of our Christmas! It was always the last thing opened on Christmas morning, and our children, ignoring their new toys, would stand with wide-eyed anticipation as their dad lifted the envelope from the tree to reveal its contents. As the children grew, the toys gave way to more practical presents, but the envelope never lost its allure.

“The story doesn’t end there. You see, we lost Mike last year due to dreaded cancer. When Christmas rolled around, I was still so wrapped in grief that I barely got the tree up. But Christmas Eve found me placing an envelope on the tree, and in the morning, it was joined by three more.

“Each of our children, unbeknownst to the others, had placed an envelope on the tree for their dad. The tradition has grown and someday will expand even further when our grandchildren, standing around the tree with wide-eyed anticipation, will watch as their fathers take down their envelope.

“Mike’s spirit, like the Christmas spirit, will always be with us.”