Good or bad, every day can be ‘enough’

Editor’s note: This is one in a series of occasional letters from Paul Graves to his grandchildren.

Dear Katie, Claire and Andy,

I began writing special letters to you, Katie, just after you were born 12 years ago. Then you, Claire, were added to my letters almost 10 years ago. Andy, your letters began almost 61/2 years ago.

For your grandma and me, these last 12 years have easily been “years of enough.”

I have sometimes asked you to calm down with “enough is enough.” But today, I write you to offer gratitude and pay respect to our loving relationship.

So I want to introduce you to a beautiful Jewish prayer, “Dayenu.” It means “It would have been enough.”

With some apology to our Jewish brothers and sisters, I want you to see how this deeply powerful ritual song inspires me when I think of our Katie, Claire and Andy.

Dayenu is sung by Jewish families during Passover, the time when they celebrate their ancestors’ exodus out of Egyptian slavery.

The story is found in the Old Testament book of Exodus. It begins with Moses’ birth and continues as the Hebrews leave Egypt and search for The Promised Land.

The song has 15 verses. The first goes like this: “If He had brought us out of Egypt, it would have been enough.”

Each verse highlights a special moment in Jewish history. It’s like every verse says, “If this is all that God had done for us, it would have been enough.”

All 15 verses are sung during Passover to remind Jewish families of God’s overflowing abundance.

To learn more, kids, look up “dayenu” on the Internet. You will see those 15 verses. Then take time to read the Exodus story.

You can see each verse points to some heartbreak. But the Hebrews’ gratitude for God’s presence wins out over the heartbreak.

In a far less dramatic way, and in a much shorter time, Grandma and I have experienced the “enough” of God if for no other reason than you three grand-gremlins, your Daddy and your Mommy, are in our lives.

If we smiled only at your spontaneous joy in a single moment, it would have been enough.

If we embraced you only when you hurt, it would have been enough.

If we only watched you first try to play piano, it would have been enough.

If we only kissed you hello and goodbye, it would have been enough.

Do you get the idea, kids? Everything you do that we see you do, or that we do with you, is a wonderful memory for us.

Even the difficult times can be wonderful memories after we get through those times. And so we are thankful to God for being with us in the happy times and the difficult times.

I don’t believe that God makes those happy and difficult times happen, like a puppet-master pulls his puppet’s strings. We play a major role in deciding if we will be grateful in good times and positive in difficult times.

But God is with us in all times – sometimes rejoicing with us and sometimes crying with us. Dayenu.

How about if we all create our own “enough” prayer when we sit down for Thanksgiving dinner? All of us, including your great-grandfather, Papa, can take turns saying something that we are thankful for and the rest of us can then say “it would have been enough.”

Let’s try that at Thanksgiving and see how it works. Our “enough” prayer just might become a family tradition.