L.A.’s saving grace: Laker Girls

LOS ANGELES – We’ve had our fun at the expense of the Celtics – A leprechaun? Seriously? Why not just put a diaper on a poodle? – and the city of Boston, which really isn’t such a bad place.

We have relatives and friends who live there and, hey, if that’s the best they can do, we’re just happy for them, OK?

But it’s time for Part 2 of our celebrated NBA finals hatred series, as if this matchup needs more manufactured bad will.

ESPN did its part this week, distorting Phil Jackson’s words enough to make it sound like he was ripping Kevin Garnett’s “smack-down” methods.

In that same spirit, we’re reporting that when Andrew Bynum said, “They’re big and burly, pretty much beasts out there on the court,” he wasn’t talking about the Celtics but their cheerleaders.

And now today’s installment: “Hating the Lakers for Dummies.”

That’s right, Laker fans. We’re taking a different perspective, completely different. We’re turning the telescope around and looking through the wrong end.

And, believe it or not, there are people who feel about the Lakers the same way you feel about Danny Ainge, up to and including the fantasy about food poisoning.

Any legitimate discussion about despising the Lakers can start only one place – with the smug smile of Kobe Bryant.

Early in these playoffs, Bryant was asked about the time Magic Johnson, as a rookie, moved from guard to center as the Lakers beat the 76ers for the NBA championship. Could he have imagined doing something similar in his first season?

“Sure,” Bryant said softly but profoundly, forgetting for the moment what actually did happen in the playoffs his rookie year.

In case you don’t remember the spring of 1997, Bryant and the Lakers lost in the second round, going down meekly in Utah as Bryant unleashed a torrent of airballs in the closing minutes.

Now, you wanna talk Laker loathing? It is difficult to quantify the dislike people outside Lakers Nation have for Sasha Vujacic. Let’s just say he wouldn’t win a popularity contest if the only other participant was crippling chest pain.

When this series shifts to Boston, Vujacic will protect himself by checking into the Lakers hotel under an assumed name – “Alex Rodriguez.”

And there are other reasons to despise a franchise that dresses itself in the colors of royalty.

•Derek Fisher, who occasionally succumbs to his emotions and plays basketball like an Oakland Raider out on parole.

•Pau Gasol, who is long and lanky and, you know, when he makes those faces while complaining to the officials, really does look like an ostrich.

•Ron Artest, who is Ron Artest.

•Lamar Odom, who married a reality TV star even as he sometimes plays this game in a fantasy land fog.

•Laker Girls, who, nah, who are we kidding? Doesn’t everyone love the Laker Girls? Even if you don’t love them, you have to love their uniforms.

Now, put Vujacic in one of those skimpy skirts and we’d have a dilemma. Not to mention an image that would haunt all of humankind.