‘Take Me Home’s cast too old for story

“Take Me Home Tonight” is a 10-years-too-late comedy. It’s ’80s nostalgia vamped up by people who were too young to have lived through the actual ’80s, but entirely too old to be playing college kids nostalgic for their high school glory days.

It’s “Hot Tub Time Machine” without the time machine or the hot tub, or the fun that entailed.

Topher Grace, now a well-preserved 32, is Matt, the recent M.I.T. grad working for Suncoast Video while he tries to decide what to do with his life.

Anna Faris, 34, is Wendy, Matt’s twin sister, equally directionless and also working at Suncoast. And Dan Fogler, also 34, is Barry, Matt’s burly, boozy, loose-cannon pal who skipped college and is regretting it.

Their story? Straight out of the ’90s – the “Can’t Hardly Wait” tale of a guy-who-never-confessed- to-his-high-school-crush.

Teresa Palmer plays Tori, the object of Matt’s affections. At 24, she’s at least the right age to be playing somebody just starting her career and her life.

Through one wild, long night, the four of them experience multiple parties, freaky L.A. party sex, drugs, grand theft auto and a great, deadly dare. And each, in his own way, has a moment of truth.

Ultimately, ’80s nostalgia, which was very briefly a big deal in the ’90s, is all about skinny ties, moussed hair, Duran Duran and “Safety Dance” – all delivered in copious quantities here. With a little cocaine on the side.

Life lessons are doled out as well. Matt, who is driving his cop dad (Michael Biehn) and his sister nuts with his indecision, must decide to “go for it.” Barry must figure out that he’s on a dead end street and find purpose.

Wendy needs to open that envelope from grad school and decide what to do with the boyfriend who just proposed to her at his big Labor Day party.

And Tori? She’s got to decide if this guy with his sports jacket sleeves rolled up is just a poseur, claiming to work at Goldman Sachs, or somebody she should never have ignored in high school.

It’s a shame Grace, who came up with the story idea for this much-delayed comedy, didn’t get this up and running right after “That ’70s Show” ended.

Even taking into account how long it sat on the shelf, hampered by a ratings controversy, he and those he surrounded himself with are a bit too long in the tooth to make this work.