Don’t trust him, he stole from you

Dear Annie: I’ve been married to “Sherwin” for two years. We are both in our 50s. He has two grown children, and I have two teenagers who still live with us.

Before we married, I thought Sherwin was perfect for me. We enjoyed everything together, and he made me feel special. Once we said “I do,” however, I saw a different side. He spent most evenings on his computer or watching TV, no longer helped around the house and only wanted to pay one-fourth of the bills since my two children and I also live here.

I own my home. Sherwin threatened to leave me if I didn’t put his name on the deed. I refused since our marriage had been so rocky. So a month ago, he left, taking our savings and all my jewelry with him. I have not let him back into the house. He has apologized over and over and returned the money and jewelry. I am not mad at him, Annie. I just don’t trust him. He begs me not to give up and promises to do better.

I have seen a counselor, who reminds me that my job is to take care of my kids and myself and not be swayed because I feel sorry for Sherwin. In my heart, I believe I am better off without him. But every time I tell him it’s over, he falls apart and apologizes. I hate to see him like this. Please advise. – I Am Stuck

Dear Stuck: Sherwin is manipulative. He charmed you into marriage, then intimidated and bullied you to get his way, and finally stole from you and walked out. Now he is playing on your sympathy in order to get back into your life. We wouldn’t trust him, either. In fact, we’d run as far away as possible. You can feel sorry for him from a distance.