Annie’s Mailbox: Sick feeling with neighbor as nurse

Dear Annie: My wife said I should ask for your advice. We have a next-door neighbor, “Dee,” whose husband died 10 years ago. She’s become my wife’s best friend and confidante. I help with maintenance on her house and car. We both think the world of her. My doctor has a small practice with one nurse. I’ve been going to him forever, but he’s getting along in years. He has a hard time keeping up with the patient charts and taking notes, so he has his nurse stay in the exam room after prepping the patients in order to assist the doctor. I’m a modest guy, but I’ve tolerated this extra woman in the room. This worked out fine until recently.

The nurse left when her husband relocated. Dee is a nurse, and she applied for the position and got it. I’m now faced with the prospect of having Dee in the room while the doctor examines me. I’m not comfortable with this. I can’t ask for a different nurse because there isn’t one. My wife thinks I’m being silly. She says seeing men undressed is part of Dee’s job and no big deal. She also told me that before Dee applied for the job, she asked if this would be a problem and my wife assured her it wouldn’t. I don’t want to cause any hard feelings with Dee. She’s a great person, but it disturbs me to think she and my wife might be discussing my health over coffee. I’ve already canceled and rescheduled a complete physical. My new appointment is coming up soon. I don’t want to switch doctors. What can I do? – Modest Mike

Dear Mike: Please inform your doctor of your concerns so he can make sure Dee follows professional standards and doesn’t discuss your health with your wife or anyone else. It is also OK to ask your doctor to examine you without Dee present or to have her leave before you disrobe. Perhaps he can record his notes if he has difficulty remembering them.