Annie’s Mailbox: Lovemaking has fizzled, four years in

Thu., Feb. 12, 2015

Marcy Sugar and Kathy Mitchell Creators Syndicate

Dear Annie: I am 53 years old and have been with my boyfriend for four years. The first year was awesome. We would hug and kiss hello and goodbye, and often say “I love you.”

Now? Nothing. We don’t touch at all. I am so unhappy. We have sex once a month and only when he wants it. During sex, there is no kissing or embracing. When I talk to him about this, he becomes angry and says I live in a fantasy world and have unrealistic expectations.

It’s not that I want sex all the time, but a little affection would be nice. Other than this, things are good. We get along well and support each other. I just wish it could be like our first year. I don’t want to start all over with someone else, but lately I’m asking myself, “Should I stay or should I go?” – Ursula

Dear Ursula: Embracing and kissing during lovemaking is normal. Please ask your boyfriend to see his doctor to check out any hormonal problems that could possibly be resolved. If he refuses to go and will not discuss it with you, you must decide how important physical affection is, because he isn’t likely to provide it.

Dear Annie: You recently printed a letter from “Wish We Knew,” and in your response, you mentioned symptoms of Parkinson’s disease. Sometimes those same symptoms can indicate other conditions.

My 83-year-old mother started twitching, shaking, having trouble sleeping and becoming dizzy. When her ankles began to swell from fluid buildup, she was finally diagnosed with a very high CO2 level. She had been on oxygen for years, and even her lung doctor missed the signs, including rapid breathing. He thought she needed more oxygen, but in fact, the problem was too much. This is a treatable condition.

Anyone with these symptoms, especially those on oxygen, should ask their doctor not only about Parkinson’s, but also about CO2 levels. – Joan in Louisiana

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