Kardashian sisters seem to ruin more professional athlete careers

When word spread recently that Odell Beckham Jr. might be romantically linked to Khloe Kardashian, prayer vigils popped up in locker rooms nationwide to lend spiritual support for yet another professional athlete cut down in his prime.

Details are sketchy – TMZ can’t be everywhere all the time and Kardashian is denying any relationship with the New York Giants wide receiver – but this is what we know:

Beckham and the reality-TV blot met at a Las Vegas party, then hooked up again and appeared very, very cuddly at Drake’s annual Memorial Day house party in Los Angeles.

(I’ll say this – every time that I go to Drake’s holiday bash, I either come home with a new wife or a praying-hands tattoo.)

It is possible that Beckham, 23, is too young to be fully aware of the Kardashian Curse.

But make no doubt about it: The Kardashians – primarily Khloe and older sister Kim – are in the process of wiping out an entire generation of precocious athletic talent. It’s been proven time and again that no players association or house of worship can protect a young athlete from a young Kardashian.

Given the choice between dating a Kardashian and tearing your rotator cuff, an athlete should drive to Cedars Sinai Medical Center ASAP.

Repeatedly, the Kardashians have sullied our finest in cleats and Nikes. They have sidetracked more NBA careers than cocaine.

(If the Kardashians had dated our founding fathers, the American experiment would’ve been over inside of five years; we’d be Cuba.)

Here’s the Kardashian love-‘em-and-leave-‘em scorecard, first with Kim’s victims:

Reggie Bush. Before Kim, he won the Heisman; after Kim, he had to return his Heisman and has endured an injury-plagued, disappointing NFL career.

Miles Austin. After back-to-back 1,000-yard seasons, the wide receiver – post-Kim – has played for three NFL teams the last three years, cut by the Eagles late last season.

Kris Humphries. Following their 72-day marriage, he has become an NBA journeyman, playing for five teams the last six seasons.

Kim also dated or reportedly had brief encounters with NFL quarterback Mark Sanchez, MLS forward Alecko Eskandarian and Real Madrid superstar Cristiano Ronaldo; Ronaldo is so good, he somehow overcame a three-day Kardashian weekend fling.

Here are Khloe’s victims:

Rashad McCants. Shortly after their breakup, the NBA guard was traded; shortly after that, he never played another NBA game.

Derrick Ward. A Super Bowl champion with the Giants in 2008, then, after dating Khloe for only four months, the running back was out of the NFL within three years.

Matt Kemp. The once-dynamic outfielder dated Khloe less than a month. Nothing good has happened since.

Lamar Odom. Don’t ask.

James Harden. Khloe’s post-Odom prey, and his NBA Rockets have struggled mightily since they started seeing each other.

(By the way, Paris Hilton is an “honorary” Kardashian – she has dated NFLers Brian Urlacher and Matt Leinart, NHLer Jose Theodore, boxer Oscar de la Hoya, skateboarder Chad Muska, tennis’ Andy Roddick and Ronaldo. She’s hit for the cycle almost twice.)

(Footnote: Ronaldo – a Kardashian and Hilton survivor – needs serious social counseling.)

There are now more than 35 Kardashians Anonymous groups nationwide. While the primary goal is abstinence from all Kardashians, members also have lobbied the E! cable network to give “Keeping Up with The Kardashians” a less favorable time slot.

As we wonder if Beckham can survive the catastrophic allure of a Kardashian, let us remember the first verse of the sublime A.E. Houseman poem, “To An Athlete Dying Young:”

The time you won your town the race

We chaired you through the market-place;

Kim and Khloe stood cheering by,

And home we brought you shoulder-high.

Ask The Slouch

Q. You wrote last week that Pabst is owned by Russians, but in fact it was bought by a Russian-born American beer entrepreneur, Eugene Kashper, and a San Francisco-based private equity firm. (Richard Boone; Sacramento)

A. Yes, as it turns out the Pabst sale was originally misreported. PBR is not in Russian hands. However, what’s done is done – no use crying over spilt beer under the bridge – and I am drinking an all-American Yuengling as I type this.

Q. I saw that CNBC reported last week that NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell had passed away. True? (Karen Kaplan; Cincinnati, Ohio)

A. I’m waiting for ESPN to confirm this.

Q. Is it true that the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences is working with Copa America Centenario to increase the diversity in acting? (Terry Golden; Vienna, Virginia)

A. Pay the man, Shirley.

Q. Using Bernie Sanders’ logic, should the Carolina Panthers have stayed on the Levi’s Stadium field until March? (Roger Strauss; Silver Spring, Maryland)

A. And dip into our PAC funds for this wise soul, Shirley.

Norman Chad is a syndicated columnist. You, too, can enter the $1.25 Ask The Slouch Cash Giveaway. Just email asktheslouch@aol.com and, if your question is used, you win $1.25 in cash!