Local author, educator helps couples plan dates for less than $5 and in fewer than 5 miles

Local author and retired Eastern Washington University professor of recreation management Barbara Brock suspects you might be in need of a fun date. In a world where loneliness has become an increasing concern on even a governmental level, she’s probably right.

Luckily for you, she just released a new guide for cheap and thoughtful dates titled “Creative Dates: The Why, the How and the Reason for Now.”

Brock’s dates come with terms. You must spend less than $5, travel fewer than 5 miles and you must send a physical invitation to your date.

But “Creative Dates” is much more than a list of cheap activities to fill your weekend. It’s an invitation to a philosophy of creating meaningful and accessible moments of connection in our increasingly expensive, digital and busy lives.

“There’s a philosopher that I mention in the book a lot named Jay B. Nash, and he wrote a seminal book in the ’50s that’s still quoted in recreation courses today,” Brock said.

“Philosophy of Recreation and Leisure,” published in 1953, opens with its central question: “Man’s dream of leisure has come true–still he must choose. Will he use leisure for dissipation, empty idleness, or will he reach for the peak of creative achievement?”

Nash distills his thoughts in a framework called “Nash’s Pyramid,” which ranks leisure activities from “creative participation” at the top, to “active participation,” “emotional participation,” and “spectatoritis-type.”

Nash’s school of thought sees leisure and recreation as a basic need, beginning at a base level with the everyday stuff you do to kill time. The next rank on the pyramid, emotional participation is similar to the spectatoritis-type, but it is passive activity that creates emotion and appreciation in the viewer. You can think of it as going from a simple “Netflix and chill” to being moved by what folks might call a “cinematic experience.”

Moving further up the pyramid is active participation such as playing a sport or performing in a play, followed by the tippy-top in Nash’s perspective, creative participation, in which the participant creates something like a work of art, an invention, a game, or a dance.

Now, don’t let this pyramid make you feel bad about the show you’re currently binging. Brock reassures that “level one, which is basically called ‘antidote to boredom,’ (is) where 99% of our recreation as a society is.”

Brock’s teachings and writings focus on subtle ways to inspire people to challenge themselves to seek out activities that fall in those other ranks of the pyramid.

“The first half of the book is on these weird, crazy, quirky assignments that I would give. … One of those was to do a six-day timeline of your week, and you had to fill out hour-by-hour what you did in just either school, work, maintenance, or leisure.”

Her students were tasked to categorize their activities according to Nash’s Pyramid, and they often came back wanting to repeat the assignment in attempt to spend more time on those higher tiers of the pyramid.

Another of her assignments was the challenge to do a kind act for another person each day for a stretch of 14 days. This one comes from Austrian psychotherapist Albert Adler, whose famous idea “Gemeinschaftsgefühlm,” translated in English as “social interest,” encourages contribution to others as a method of fostering self-worth and feelings of belonging.

“Just these little ways we can tweak our life and our activity. Imagine just waking up and saying ‘OK, I gotta do one secret, nice thing for somebody else, just one little thing.’ It’s kind of like the invitation of the creative date, you’d start thinking about it and maybe having fun with it,” said Brock.

Brock leaves readers with a few ideas to enact these small but significant activities, some inspired by the stories shared by her students of their own experiences completing her creative date assignment. One of her favorites comes from a student with a welder boyfriend.

“She thought for their creative date, she asked him if he would teach her how to weld. And they welded a signpost for her parents to be on their ranch.”

Brock gleefully shared that the student’s parent attended her recent book signing and told the group all about the sign that hangs at the end of their driveway to this day.

To learn more about Brock’s thoughts on recreation and her suggestions for creative dates in the area, you can purchase her book at Wishing Tree Books in the South Perry Neighborhood.

But in the meantime, here are a few ideas to get you started.

This one comes straight from an internet trend. Sit across a table from your date and draw a portrait of one another. Keep it a secret until you’re done or time runs out, then reveal. Artistic talent not required. Laughter may ensue.

Got a date who grew up loving the “I Spy” books? Create a nature or neighborhood scavenger list. Visit a nearby park or take a walk around the park and see how many items you can cross off your list. Consider snapping some photos of your scavenger list finds.

Know a plant lover? Visit Gaiser Conservatory in Manito Park and see if you can find their houseplants in the greenhouse. Just be careful to not mention anything about how healthy those ones look in comparison. Or do, and top your date off with some collaborative plant care research.

Spice up a coffee date with a group bike ride. Join for one of Roast House’s shop-to-shop rides that kicks off at their tasting room.

Have a nostalgic friend? Go antique store hopping and compete for the find of the day. Snap a photo of the victor and their find. Bonus points if the photo is taken on an ever-nostalgic Polaroid.

Does your date have a lot of energy? Hit up the Centennial Trail for near-endless walking or running, and beautiful views along the way.

Indulge your book nerd in some cozy, no-cost browsing at your local bookstore, be it Auntie’s, Wishing Tree, Jupiter’s Eye, 2nd Look, the Comic Book Shop, Giant Nerd, Page 42, FinnBoy or Monkey Biz. Consider turning it into a date series to visit them all.

Pretty sure you’re dating a genius? Cheer them on at Riverfront Park near the red wagon during the grand opening of their new chess tables. Local chess enthusiasts are offering games, lessons, and free play from 4 to 8 p.m. on Sept. 3.

Gaga for an artist? Take them to Riverfront Park’s Art Drop Day on Sept. 6. From 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. when local artists will leave their art in the park for others to find and keep.

Got a dancer in the family? Take them to a Saturday line dance class at the Shadle Park library branch from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m.

Does your date have a thirst for competition? Challenge them to a game of basketball at your local park or schoolyard. Or if they’re not the sporting type, take your favorite board or card game to the park.

Need more ideas? Check out the community calendar at spokesman.com/calendar.