Perv John Rollins Tuggle being escorted to a hearing last week. See Second Item

The easiest instruction that moto-cop gave Dan English (pictured) was how to pay his 45-in-a-35 speeding ticket to the clerk of the district court. Which happens to be Dan. Seems Dan was hurrying to get his wife, Cory, to work on time at Kootenai Medical Center when he punched it through a light on Highway 95, just north of Appleway, and noticed the CPD Blue at the same intersection. Cory thought about making a run for it because she was late to an important conference but stayed. This, while a Berry Picker noted the vanity plate on Dan's grey rig: "GOVOTE." Afterward, Dan philosophized: "I should be glad I instituted a program a few years back so people can pay the ticket via credit card! You know, so I can get those infrequent flyer miles." And higher insurance rates?

Stupid Criminals
Razzberries (or "Why runaway perv John Collins Tuggle got caught in Wallace): 1. He was the first contestant to be voted off "Survivor, Shoshone County," 2. Stupid is as stupid does, 3. Euell Gibbons he's not, 4. Three-for-1 hot dog special at Wallace's Conoco was too much to pass up, and 5. What's the use modeling a camouflage, macho, survivalist outfit if no one's around to see it? ... Poet's Corner: "They searched with men and dogs/They searched the woods and the bogs/Tuggle crept from the woods/For edible goods/And was arrested after buying HOT DOGS!" -- Rant 'N Rave with CDADave blog ("The Capture of John Collins Tuggle") ... "Sam, the best gift you can give yourself is to live to celebrate a 22nd birthday. Feeling the glow, having fun with or without mass quantities of alcohol is a right of passage, too. Be smart, be safe, have fun" -- advice to UI senior-to-be Sam Taylor by Huckleberries Online commenters after he asked on his Vandal Sense blog about good ways to survive his 21st birthday (which occurred Friday).

Another Milestone
In the "Good Gals Find A Way" category, Tara LaCelle-Miller birthed 6-pound-9 Karsyn Kyle Miller July 9. The big deal? Tara's the gal who was partially paralyzed after being shot accidentally while she slept through a mutual wall of the next apartment. Since then, she's married Kyle Miller, accomplishing her goal to "walk" down the aisle with the aid of braces and relatives, forgave her assailant, and appeared with him on national TV. Simply amazing ...Oopsy: That "Good Greif ... Kadee ... 9 lbs" readerboard sign at the CDA downtown fire station was spelled entirely correctly, sez Kadee's Proud Poppa Tom Greif, who's probably spent his career explaining to reporters why "E" comes before "I" in firefighter surnames ... That rumbling you heard at CDA's Forest Cemetery was leatherneck Ron Rankin rolling over because I referred to the guy who broke up that Bayview Daze fight earlier this month as an "ex-Marine." I know. I know. Once a Marine, always a Marine.

Huckleberries
In Post Falls, D.J. Nall of Hauser, spotted a Mickey D billboard advertising job openings for $6.75 per hour, while Taco Bell down the street was offering $7. Hey, don't laugh at our version of a job war; that's big money in Idaho, where the minimum wage if $5.15 ... The reason CDA's Phil Corless didn't respond as the Little Old Ladies at Coldwater Creek did when he heard his daughter shriek from the public restroom? He knew his wife was with his Little One. And smiled to himself when a Seasoned Citizen reported back that a little girl had seen a spider ... Bumpersnicker: "Guns don't kill people, people with cell phones do" ... Sign of the Times: "Marriage isn't math. Don't multiply and then divide" sightem by Kelly Richards/Concerned Biz of North Idaho (pictured) on a Priest River biz ... In civilized society, you report to the authorities if someone allegedly vandalizes your rig. In Bayview, you chain his $10,000 1968 Harley to the back of your rig, set it on fire, drag it thre times through town -- and call yourself even. Where's Judge Judy when you need her?

Parting Shot:
Didja hear the one about The Coeur d'Alene Resort driver who slammed on his brakes despite the green light at Second and Sherman because a pedestrian was jaywalking? He: Pay more attention the the lights." She: "Ah, go back to California!" That's a North Idahoan's answer to anything that bugs her.

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