The true ‘ideal’ is a loving environment

President Bush recently did a disservice to gay and lesbian parents. Said Bush: “Studies have shown that the ideal is where a child is raised in a married family with a man and a woman.”

Actually, many studies show that children do just as well with gay and lesbian parents.

One recent study, conducted by psychologists at the University of Virginia and the University of Arizona, concluded that 44 girls and boys from lesbian-parent households were no more confused or moody than a group of adolescents from similar but heterosexual-parent households.

In 2001, the American Sociological Review published “(How) Does the Sexual Orientation of Parents Matter?” by Judith Stacey and Timothy Biblarz of the University of Southern California. They re-examined the findings of 21 studies that compared children of lesbian or gay parents with children of straight parents. They concluded there were no significant differences between gay or straight parents or their children, but the differences some studies did report could be seen as advantages.

For example, one study found lesbian mothers less concerned about their children conforming to gender roles and stereotypes. Another reported daughters of lesbians aspiring to a wider range of careers. Another study reported children developing closer ties to lesbian stepmothers than to heterosexual stepfathers.

I’m a gay parent of an 8-year-old, and I’ve made gay parents my professional life as well by publishing Gay Parent magazine since 1998. I know – both personally and professionally – that parents, gay or straight, share the same basic interests in childrearing.

Although gay and lesbian parents are now an integral part of contemporary American culture, discrimination still exists, as evidenced by Bush’s remark.

Then there is Education Secretary Margaret Spellings, who helped censor the new children’s television show “Postcards From Buster” because it included children with two moms.

Spellings wrote to PBS that federal funding is not meant “to introduce this kind of subject matter to children.” In reality, the focus of this episode was simply on children guiding an animated Buster around as they made maple syrup and cheese.

The ideal family situation need not depend on the presence of parents who are a legally married male and female. Within all family structures, the focus should simply be on providing children with a loving, nurturing environment.