She finds hope, loses weight

Two years ago, she couldn’t walk to the mailbox. Her weight had broken her couch. She was mercilessly teased.

At 400 pounds, Crystaldawn Verhaeghe had given up hope.

“I became a recluse,” Verhaeghe said. “I had literally given up.”

She had no idea that on the desperate day in July 2004 when she dropped off her old, unused exercise equipment at a Deer Park thrift shop, she would discover what she now considers the secret to losing 225 pounds:

The joy of friendship and the power of hope.

With millions of Americans this week making the traditional New Year’s pledge to lose weight, Verhaeghe’s story serves as an inspiring tale. No fad diets. No must-order-by-midnight-tonight gadgets. Just dedication to making needed changes in her life, determination to stick with it, and encouragement from a true friend.

Now, at 175 pounds and still falling, Verhaeghe, 49, sits at her home in a rocking chair far too big for her, one she once had to squeeze into.

“I’m living proof that miracles really can happen,” she said.

And she didn’t do it alone.

Linda Lourey, who helps run Just Say Yes Ministries in Deer Park, was in the thrift store when Verhaeghe walked through the door with a load of exercise equipment to give away. To Verhaeghe’s astonishment, Lourey offered to help.

“She really had given up hope,” Lourey said. Health problems and so many pounds meant Verhaeghe had to start small.

So, the pair first began with Verhaeghe lifting her arms above her head. Then, they did resistance exercises. She also began taking a vitamin drink. Soon Verhaeghe was able to walk to the end of her driveway. She started using her treadmill. She took strolls. All the while, she learned how to eat healthier, and learned of an allergy to wheat.

And before she knew it, the pounds were dropping. 100 pounds, 200 pounds, and even still they’re shedding.

“I’ve lost half of me,” she said, beaming from her rocking chair and often springing up and displaying items from her past: a pair of pants with a leg big enough to hold her whole lower half; a treadmill in her living room that she can use as high as the timer will run; a photo that reminds her daily of how far she’s come.

Those days, from high school forward, when she was obese, were hard, she said. The stigma of being overweight ground her down.

“People wouldn’t even look at me,” she said. “They wouldn’t talk to me, and they wouldn’t be a friend.”

She isolated herself at home, and her two young boys became seriously worried about her health.

“I became a recluse,” Verhaeghe said. “I had literally given up.”

People who had been her friends would turn on her, calling her names.

“They’ll be so disgusted with you, they’ll make mean remarks thinking that will help you lose weight,” Verhaeghe said.

She knew she had to lose the pounds, but it wasn’t until she made a friend in Lourey that she felt she could do it.

“Ridding myself of the weight and all that the weight represents has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever done,” Verhaeghe said.

But once the pounds started to disappear, she took delight in seeing her friends and neighbors.

A clerk at her favorite bookstore, a man from her son’s Boy Scout troop, and even her doctor all had the same reaction: a dropped jaw and a gasp of surprise.

“It can get to the point where so many people give up on you,” Verhaeghe said. “The key is to have support. If you can focus on the positive things, it’s like it feeds on itself.”

Verhaeghe now wants to help others. Neither she nor Lourey pretends to be weight-loss experts, but they do know where to start.

“You have to reprogram your mind,” Lourey said. “There isn’t one diet, there isn’t a magic pill. You can’t continue what you’re doing.”

Verhaeghe and Lourey plan to spend January discussing their experiences and perhaps even encouraging others looking to lose weight. They will gather at 10 a.m. each Saturday this month in Suite 207 at 9616 E. Sprague Ave., Spokane.

“We’re trying to encourage other people not to give up hope and to find the method that works for them,” she said.

For Verhaeghe, that meant serious changes to her lifestyle, but along the way she found things she never expected, like laughter, and energy, and even four hours of dancing last July.

“I think it was the laughter that helped me lose weight,” Verhaeghe said, smiling and looking out her window. “You can just never give up.”