The latest sign of gender equalty: the TV remote

Count this as another busted myth of modern times: In family life, the husband always wields the television remote.

Lately, the wife is just as likely to be changing the channels.

A poll released this week by the Pew Research Center showed that 21st-century couples share decision making in many aspects of American family life, and nowhere is that equity greater than in front of the household television. The poll found that 27 percent of people say women control the remote; 26 percent say that men do; and 25 percent say the couple decide together.

This change in everyday life could be one small sign of a larger social shift in the last generation, experts say.

“I think the big story over time is the rise in shared decision making,” said Andrew Cherlin, a professor of sociology and public policy at Johns Hopkins University. “It’s not the same as the ’50s and ’60s, where ‘father knew best.’ ”

The poll includes the answers of 1,260 people who were married or living together as a couple; it has a margin of error of 3 percent. Overall, the poll reports that in 43 percent of couples, women had the most to say in a combination of four categories: decision making in finances, weekend activities, television choices and big-ticket purchases. Decision making was divided equally for 31 percent of couples, and men took the lead in 26 percent of couples.

Pew researchers said the television results could be affected by the fact that families have multiple televisions. They noted that a study by Nielsen Media Research showed that American homes, on average, included more televisions than people.

Cherlin said he was impressed that so many people who were polled said that their household decisions were jointly made, even though they were not given that choice as an answer to the poll’s questions. They volunteered it.

“I’m struck by the fact that, overall, 31 percent of the people said the decision was shared, even though that option was not read to them,” he said. “Clearly, there is more sharing than there used to be. There is more variation in who makes the decisions and less of a sense that the home is the man’s castle.”

One of the most notable results of the poll, he said, was on joint control of household finances. Among men, 37 percent said they controlled finances, with 30 percent saying their partner did and 28 percent saying finances were handled jointly.

“I think that’s a big change from 50 years ago,” Cherlin said. Back then, he said, “some wives didn’t even know what their husbands were making.”

Less surprising, he said, was that women took charge of weekend activities and major household purchases, many of which he said are related to home life.