In His New Film, Swayze Sings Out, ‘I Feel Pretty’

In the forthcoming movie “To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar,” actors Patrick Swayze, Wesley Snipes and John Leguizamo play a trio of drag queens.

And Swayze, for one, took the role seriously.

“(The movie) gave me huge empathy for what it is to live as a woman,” he told Premiere magazine. “Now I find myself in conversations with women, and when they talk about their nails, I’ll say, ‘What I find is, if you take them just a little bit shorter, they can look as nice and they’re easier to take care of.’ They look at me, like, What the hell? And then they say, ‘Oh yeah, you do know what you’re talking about.”’

But the joy couldn’t last. “There was a moment looking in the mirror before the very last shot and I said out loud to myself, ‘It’s the last time I get to be pretty.”’

Loose talk

Boomer Esiason, quarterback-turned-author of the children’s book “A Boy Named Boomer,” on why he has no plans to write further: “My critics will all be 6 years old, and they don’t know any better.”

He’s bound to get bushwhacked by a surprise party

Daniel Stern turns 38 today.

Shoot, Earl, ever won knose you spill it D-A-W-G

Some things, say, the anger of author Harlan Ellison, are constant. “The state of journalism in the U.S. at the moment can be found somewhere between the Okefenokee swamp and the Love Canal,” he said at the American Booksellers Convention. “It is a polluted stream of tabloid lunacy, without honor, and produced by culturally illiterate incompetents who need a spell-checker to get the word dog correct.”

Otherwise, they’d have a reeeaaalllly big mess

And why does the staff keep the Ed Sullivan Theater, home of “Late Night with David Letterman, so cold? Says executive producer Robert “Morty” Morton, “To keep Ed from rotting.”

But if he’d used it, maybe he coulda been a contenda

Kevin Pollack, the comic-turned-actor (“Miami Rhapsody,” “The Usual Suspects,”) has mixed feeling about working with Method actors. “I understand the process and I respect the technique,” he told USA Today, “but I still want to slap them and say, get over yourself.”

Then, the next day, he did the same to his legs

David Schwimmer of “Friends” says he was a nerd in real life. “I had a mustache when I was 13,” he says. “I was embarrassed beyond belief, but my parents would not let me shave. I finally rebelled and (used) some of my sister’s Nair on my upper lip. Left it on too long, of course. I burned my whole upper lip. So instead of just one day discreetly having no hair on my face, everyone saw that I had this huge red burn.”

Does that mean that, before a shot, they’ll yell ‘Foreplay’?

“Sports Illustrated reports there’s a golf course in France that is designed like the body of a naked woman,” says Jay Leno. “That should speed up the game. Instead of five hours, guys will be done in like, two minutes now.”

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: 2 Photos

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Dan Webster