Women Have Right To Work, Family
Letters, I get letters and phone calls and faxes and e-mail. This correspondence is edited.
Reader: I was happy to read your reply to the man who said he felt “betrayed and angry” when a female employee had to leave a project because she was pregnant. You asked if he felt the same way when a man was out for months with a heart attack.
Well, I’m one of those who was on a project for two years and just when it was about to go “live,” I had my first child. My manager really “slammed” it to me after that by putting all kinds of pressure on me. I do understand the disappointment, but if I had said I planned to have a family, I wouldn’t have gotten the job - and that’s not fair. I didn’t plan to deceive them and am angry that I was made out to be a criminal. I think they assumed since I had been married for a while and was a certain age, I wouldn’t have children.
Frankly, I’m the one who feels angry and betrayed.
Comment: The problem you describe - discrimination against employed women of childbearing age - is the reason the federal Pregnancy Discrimination Act was passed. It’s crazy to be punished for having children. Thank goodness women don’t have to ask their employers’ permission to have a baby!
Reader: How do you find out the salaries of men who work at your company to do a comparison? A guy who got promoted after me told me he got a raise after six months in his new position. But I was told salaries were strictly annual.
When I asked personnel about it, I was told employees should never discuss their salaries with other workers.
Is that why salaries are secret - so women won’t find out how much they’re underpaid compared to men?
Comment: Companies keep salaries secret and usually forbid people to talk about them because they don’t want discontented workers. That secret is one of the reasons for the continuing wage gap between women and men.
You’re lucky to have a friend who tells you such important information - I hear from many grateful women whose male colleagues tell them the truth about their pay - but generally you have to find out on the outside. That means through professional organizations, networking, people who work at other companies and from the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. It’s not easy, and you don’t want to lose your job.
Many companies have job classifications with salary ranges, but usually they’re so broad they don’t tell you much. Your question reminds me of something an economist told me long ago.
She said, “It doesn’t help to know the salary of the women you work with. Find out what the men are making.”
Reader: I’m in a tough situation with my job search. Previously, I relocated every two years due to my husband’s jobs. Last year, he unexpectedly died. I stayed at my job until the house was sold and then quit. Now, I’m trying to relocate to another city and another life. What do I tell interviewers about why I’ve been unemployed for a year? I’m not a professional; I’m a clerical/administrative assistant.
Comment: Good for you for putting your life back together. In a job interview, I think you should say, with confidence, that you had to attend to family problems which are now resolved. That’s all you need to say.
Reader: I was asked personal questions in a job interview. It was like playing tennis, because I would say one thing to avoid answering the question and he would shoot back with something else. He wanted to know my marital status, what my husband did, how many children I had, what my parents did, how many siblings, etc.
I became annoyed at his questions and more so at my own attempts not to answer them, so I told him he couldn’t ask them. I didn’t get the job. Are those questions legal?
Comment: No, they aren’t. Sex discrimination in hiring is against the law and you may have the basis for a lawsuit, if you want to pursue one. In the future, it may be helpful to defuse these illegal questions by saying you are a professional and you never let anyone down for any reason.