Cheap Seats

It must have been part of his bonus clause

Baltimore Orioles All-Star outfielder Brady Anderson is as quick with the wit as he is with the bat.

Anderson, a bachelor, drew quizzical looks from the O’s beat writers, when he was seen in the team clubhouse cradling Chris Hoiles’ 14-month-old son, Dalton.

“You make two straight All-Star games, they give you a baby,” Anderson replied.

Tiger’s Troops are far cry from Arnie’s Army

Tiger Woods’ excitable fans may need some curbs if they do not eventually embrace the proper decorum of golf, a past president of the United States Golf Association said.

At last month’s Buick Classic, Jeff Maggert, who played with Woods, called some fans “obnoxious,” especially those who incessantly bellowed, “Tiger, you the man!” and other exhortations.

And on the final hole of the Western Open in suburban Chicago, Woods was followed down the 18th fairway by a boisterous, adoring crowd of thousands, a rare scene in golf.

“It doesn’t take many coming into the game from the outside to change the image, if they haven’t been exposed to the traditions and don’t understand the difference,” former USGA president Bill Campbell.

“We don’t need that hooting and hollering.”

What we need are more boring, 65-year-old men dressed in tartan plaid.

Stockton will start the car, Malone will drive it

Utah Jazz forward Karl Malone and guard John Stockton are teaming up off court to sell cars.

Stockton to Malone Honda, the first joint business venture of the two stars, is expected to open its doors in the Salt Lake City suburb of Sandy shortly before the NBA season starts this fall.

Malone remains a partner in several other businesses. He recently acquired an ownership interest in Acme Stone, which is doing the stone work on his new home, and is also working on acquiring an interest in a Utah Burger King franchise.

Talk about your classless act

ChiSox chairman Jerry Reinsdorf said he thought the boos the Cleveland fans gave Albert Belle at the All-Star Game were classless.

“I thought it was rather crass,” said Reinsdorf. “The whole thing was Cleveland not putting its best foot forward. And I thought Albert handled it with a lot of dignity, and I thought it was great when he raised his hands like he did.

And to think, he refrained from raising his middle finger.

Free hip-waders would have been more useful

On the day a game between the Kansas City Royals and Milwaukee Brewers was postponed by flooding at Milwaukee County Stadium, the promotion scheduled was a golf umbrella giveaway.

Guess that includes an Apple Cup victory

Inside Sports tabs the University of Washington as the No. 1 team in college football, predicting the Huskies will go 11-0 during the regular season.

The last word …

“Mr. President, Mike Mussina. Stanford Class of ‘91. Hope your daughter enjoys it.”

- Baltimore pitcher Mike Mussina introducing himself to President Clinton

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Photo