Cheap Seats
Would that make him a ‘medium’?
From Bernie Lincicome in the Chicago Tribune:
“News: Karl Malone wants out, blames Utah media for making Karl Malone miserable.
Views: And the Utah media is sorry. I know he is. I talked to him.”
Not exactly part of the Fab Five
Mike Szyndlar, a University of Michigan basketball player, is a walk-on, a guy who wasn’t recruited to play but through open tryouts somehow made the team. Walk-ons - and you might find this hard to believe - comprise nearly half of the Michigan basketball squad this season.
Now usually playing big-time college basketball can get you fame, money and lots of female admirers. But sometimes, reports Detroit Free Press columnist Mitch Albom, you’re happy with a black eye.
“That was my proof that I was really on the team,” says Szyndlar, who took an elbow from Robert “Tractor” Traylor in practice a few years ago, and got a shiner the size of Brazil. “My eye was so swollen, I couldn’t see or read anything. But I was telling everyone, ‘Robert Traylor gave me this!’
“It showed people that I really did play for Michigan.”
And gives new meaning to the term, walk-on.
It’s attaboy or outta the way!
If you’ve wondered what a bench coach does for a baseball team, Bob Verdi of the Chicago Tribune asked that question of Don Zimmer, bench coach for the New York Yankees.
“Well, I’ll tell you,” Zimmer said. “When Joe (Torre, the manager) calls for a hit-and-run and it works, I get real close to him for the TV cameras and pat him on the back.
“If he calls for a hit-and-run and it doesn’t work, I get up and walk to the other end of the dugout for a drink of water.
“That’s what a bench coach does.”
Flipping out
From David Letterman’s “Top Ten Signs the Football Game You Are Watching is Fixed:”
“During a coin toss, a player calls heads and the ref says, ‘That’s close enough.”’
Oh, yeah?
Jay Delsing, former UCLA player and struggling PGA Tour pro: “The neat thing about golf is what you’ve done in the past has nothing to do with what you might do in the future.”
Talk about riveting TV
Interestingly, Charlotte Hornet guard B.J. Armstrong thinks television is the answer to the NBA lockout.
“We need to get the media in on the negotiations,” Armstrong said. “If these guys make mistakes, people will see it. I want to see what NBA Commissioner David Stern looks and acts like at the negotiating table.
“If I can see O.J. Simpson and I can see Bill Clinton testifying before Kenneth Starr, why can’t I see NBA negotiations on TV?”
Has to be better than a regular-season game.
The last word …
“You know things aren’t going good when you get to Phoenix and it’s snowing.”
- Montreal forward Shayne Corson, on the troubles of the last-place Canadiens.