Cheap Seats
One near kill, one save
New York Post columnist, rumormonger and NBA know-it-all Peter Vecsey:
“If you’re keeping score at home, Latrell Sprewell is almost even. He tried to kill one coach, P.J. Carlesimo, and is attempting to save another, (Knicks coach) Jeff Van Gundy.”
One slam dunk
Vecsey was a guest on former Georgetown basketball coach John Thompson’s D.C radio show, and got on him right away for not having him as a guest sooner.
“Oh, you’ve been on plenty of times before,” Thompson replied. “You just haven’t been present to defend yourself.”
No hockey town
Mark Kiszla of the Denver Post, commenting before the first NHL playoff game between the Dallas Stars and Colorado, which the Avalanche won:
“Thermometers across Texas figure to pop 90 degrees today. There ought to be a law against playing hockey in a sweatshop. And Dallas never should be allowed to win an NHL championship.
“What in the name of Lord Stanley would Texas cowboys and cowgirls do with the Stanley Cup? Fill it with salsa and go buy a bag of chips?
No baseball town
Toronto outfielder Shawn Green on the Blue Jays’ irritation when SkyDome fans erupt in cheers at inappropriate moments because of scoring updates on the Toronto Maple Leafs:
“We love it when everyone gets into the game, as long as it’s our game.”
Hey Shawn, when you’re in Canada, hockey is OUR game.
Hey, it’s a football town
Cincinnati Reds first baseman Sean Casey on his team’s 24-12 victory over the Colorado Rockies at Coors Field:
“That was like a summer league softball game, and we won the keg of beer.”
A patented John Elway comeback would have fixed that outcome.
Ernie knows the score
Blackie Sherrod in the Dallas Morning News: “There has long been a debate if golfers qualify as jocks. From Ernie Els:
“ `I don’t think we’re athletes at all. You don’t have to be anything to be a golfer. You just go out and hit balls.”’ And lie and swear and ruin half the day.
Perhaps a small bribe is in order
The big Olympic issue in Salt Lake City now isn’t the corruption scandal, but where to get a drink.
Concerned that the Utah capital’s restrictions on alcohol might alienate foreign cultures where beer and wine are normal table items, the IOC asked Salt Lake organizers to ease up and let the booze flow during the 2002 Winter Games.
Utah officials have said repeatedly they would not relax the laws for the Olympics.
The last word …
“I was only going three-quarters to 75 percent.”
- Philadelphia Phillies catcher Mike Lieberthal on resuming play after suffering a pelvic injury.