Cheap Seats
Yes, dear, whatever you say
Tom Lehman played in an alternate shot couples’ tournament with his wife, Melissa, and learned a lesson in reasoning.
The former British Open champion hit his tee shot down the middle about 275 yards on the first hole. Melissa shanked the next shot about 100 yards from the green. Lehman hit their third shot 15 feet from the cup. Melissa’s putt ended up 20 feet on the other side. Lehman sank his putt for a bogey.
Leaving the green, he told Melissa that if they expected to win, she needed to start playing a little better.
“Well,” she said, “You took three shots. I only took two.”
He’ll do in a pinch
Tim Duncan, the San Antonio Spurs superstar, has impressed guard Steve Kerr during preseason workouts.
“He’s really improved,” said Kerr. “I told him the other day that he could probably start for a lot of teams in this league.”
Surf’s up
Sailors on the East Coast still can’t get over the day Dennis Conner took the America’s Cup from Newport, R.I., to San Diego. Writes Tony Chamberlain in the Boston Globe:
“Some think America’s Cup all but died in the minds of the sporting public because every image of competition since 1987 came from San Diego, where Southern California’s laid-back zephyrs make paint drying look exciting.
“`The Coma off Point Loma’ is how the Euro-wags described the 1992 and 1995 Cups.”
Image is everything
Fans at the UCLA-Cal game last week were surprised when Cal quarterback Kyle Boller was yanked for a couple of plays right after his team had been penalized for delay of game.
Coach Tom Holmoe explained: “We’re watching the play clock run down, and Kyle’s pulling up his socks.”
That’s not very nice
Peter Vescey on Detroit Pistons center Bison Dele’s possible retirement: “Dele says he doesn’t want to come to camp and give a half-hearted effort. Funny, it never stopped him before.”
The last word …
“Doesn’t it seem as if every time a Fox or NBC camera zooms in on a player or manager, a spray of spit is certain to follow? It’s uncanny. You don’t need a remote to watch baseball on television these days. You need a windshield wiper.”
- Leonard Shapiro in the Washington Post