Follow your heart in career choice

DEAR DIANE: I am a 19-year-old freshman attending an Ivy League university. My father is a prominent New York physician and is financing my education (including a monthly stipend). I am also a “legacy” pledge to his fraternity.

I am, as you may have guessed, enrolled as a pre-med student. It is expected of me to follow in the footsteps of my father, and as you’ve read above, he is doing all he can to see that I do so.

Here’s the problem: I don’t want to be a doctor.

I’m not doing the “rebellious teenager” bit and defying my father just because it’s something people my age do. I honestly do not want to become a physician.

What would give me the greatest satisfaction in life is to be a firefighter. I grew up in New York and was so emotionally moved by the courage of the men and women of the FDNY during Sept. 11, that from that day on I knew what I wanted to devote my life to doing.

I told my father about my dream, and he said he could understand how I could feel that way about the firefighters. He also said that I could do more to help people by becoming a physician.

In my mind, I can see his point. In my heart, though, there is something else.

What do I do, Diane? — Torn in the USA

Dear Torn: I think it’s about time you cut the cord and free yourself from your father’s financial influence.

Follow your heart and become a firefighter. Perhaps after working as a firefighter for a few years, you might change your mind and decide then to go back to medical school.

But when you do, it’ll be on your own terms and on your own dime, because by then, you’ll be your own man.