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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

Out with old, in with smaller new



 (The Spokesman-Review)
Courtney Dunham Correspondent

The time has come for me to part with “The Twins.” Their absence will be felt tremendously since they’ve been leading me for years. They’ve been my east, west and every other direction I’ve tried to move since I hit puberty. I will be cutting them loose in a few weeks or, as they say in medical terms, undergoing a breast reduction.

I’ve never been more scared or excited for an event. It’s something I’ve debated doing for years. Cutting them down to a more comfortable size was never the dilemma – it was moving “parts” that scared me. But as the doctor pointed out, “Well right now they’re way down there and they need to be up here.”

Speaking of the doctor, if you’re looking for a way to get over your modesty, see a plastic surgeon. He’ll pull, tug and grab your fat more than you’ve ever dared to in the mirror. But I have to say the experience was quite liberating. I was dreading having him see my breasts, much less tug at them and tell me exactly where he was going to cut. But by the end of the exam, I was so comfortable, I was posing for the before photographs stark naked without a care in the world.

Our moment of ease came after he discussed his concerns over my insurance coverage. My policy covers 85 percent of the procedure if you have a history of a bad back or neck. After a major back surgery and years of stiffness in my neck and shoulders, I’m an ideal candidate since my frame can’t accommodate such large breasts. The only hitch is that my insurance stipulates that at least 700 grams be taken from each breast. This can be a challenge, my doctor said, since in most cases that wouldn’t leave much behind. I had a feeling that I wasn’t going to fall into that category, though.

“I think of myself as an artist,” he said, “not just a surgeon, so I want to leave you with a nice and full breast.”

At this point, I hadn’t uncovered yet, so I looked smaller than I actually am. Once I slipped into my open gown, he was able to get a good feel, you might say, for whether they’d be covered by insurance.

He opened my gown and politely said, “Oh my, we’re not going to have a problem at all taking 700 grams out of these babies. You’ll have plenty left.”

I laughed out loud because he was right – my boobs are bigger than God’s, if he had any. Granted I’m sure many others are bigger, but I’m also short, so mine literally take over my upper body.

Plastic surgery is huge now, and there’s a lot of debate about people loving their bodies the way they are. I believe it’s a personal decision as to what makes someone most comfortable in their skin. I am doing this first and foremost to relieve the pressure on my back, but I’ll also be honest and say I’m looking forward to not wearing oversized tops anymore. I had to wear a bra at age 8, and my breasts always have controlled my sense of style and freedom to dress how I wanted to. I just want to dress like a girl.

I know that confidence comes from the inside, so I’m not looking at this surgery as changing the way I feel about myself. But like a lot of changes I’ve endured this past year, I think it literally will make me feel a lot lighter and free.

It’s time to say adios, my dear and ever present twins – we’ve come a long way together, but it’s time to cut the apron strings or, in this case, cut the double Ds.